About galt : Fuck you all.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48647) - you deserved it (2867)
On 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36498) - you deserved it (4936)
On 04/21/2013 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)
Today, I woke up feeling awful, having caught the same illness my boyfriend had last night. When he was sick, I skipped my friend's baby shower to take care of him. Now that I'm sick, he goes to a friend's place, says to call if I need him, then turns his phone off. Seriously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47971) - you deserved it (5905)
On 04/20/2013 at 7:40pm - love - by Thanks Babe (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my crew was called out to do some house maintenance. We were nearly done, when someone had the goddamned fucking brilliant idea of washing plaster off their hands in the kitchen sink, which clogged the pipes. Instead of getting paid, we now owe for damages. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35971) - you deserved it (4283)
On 04/20/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was rear ended at McDonald's by the same driver who rear ended me at the same McDonald's last week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48374) - you deserved it (6848)
On 04/20/2013 at 9:43am - misc - by dentedmercedes - United States (Michigan)
Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML
I agree, your life sucks (49316) - you deserved it (5946)
On 04/20/2013 at 8:02am - love - by How strange - United States
Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34389) - you deserved it (16704)
On 04/10/2013 at 9:26am - kids - by fatmom (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I was riding a new horse when a lawnmower starting up spooked her. She jumped straight up in the air and I landed directly on the saddle horn. I can't walk or feel anything between my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32198) - you deserved it (3144)
On 04/10/2013 at 5:06am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39956) - you deserved it (7898)
On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, as a learner driver, I embarked on my longest drive ever: back home, from Sydney to Melbourne, which is around a 700km drive. I managed to get the whole way without any problems. I crashed into my driveway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32326) - you deserved it (5019)
On 04/06/2013 at 4:51am - health - by aaaaahhhh (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML
I agree, your life sucks (50462) - you deserved it (10739)
On 03/28/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by everyoneheard (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I came home from a relaxing, peaceful vacation. When I got home my 4-year-old son was free-balling with poop all over his body, screaming "Bob the Builder will kick your ass." The baby sitter is nowhere to be found and I can't get him to stop saying, "I love ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34330) - you deserved it (3686)
On 03/27/2013 at 4:00am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, a customer came up to me and asked if I knew where the make-up aisle was. I pointed him in the right direction but he just gasped and said, "Oh so you DO know where it is!" and walked away, roaring with laughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29359) - you deserved it (2992)
On 03/27/2013 at 3:29am - work - by apparentlytoougly (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I casually mentioned to my mom that my boyfriend of two years and I were thinking about moving in together. She looked me dead in the eye and said if I ever moved out, she'd throw me out of the house. I'm confused. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23920) - you deserved it (1765)
On 03/27/2013 at 2:47am - misc - by Imafishyfishy (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was on a bumpy bus ride and had to write a note, so I held my notebook against the bus window to steady my hand. An elderly woman then yelled at me, accusing me of drawing graffiti on the window. The bus driver kicked me off and I had to wait an hour in the rain for the next bus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28366) - you deserved it (1691)
On 03/27/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by 00sasori - Canada (British Columbia)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
