fuck_this_shit_5

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fuck_this_shit_5

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 October 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5486
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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fuck_this_shit_5's page activity

Visits<b>crush451</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 8:41pm<b>iHazTheMuffinz</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 7:38pm<b>volleygirl16</b> - the 12/16/2011 at 10:17pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:40pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:52am<b>Daileass</b> - the 02/04/2011 at 9:25am<b>LilAfo</b> - the 10/25/2010 at 4:42pm<b>BlackHawk214</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 7:08pm<b>MisterAmazing</b> - the 10/21/2010 at 2:02pm<b>jramos0070</b> - the 10/03/2010 at 2:08pm<b>lilauer13</b> - the 09/28/2010 at 3:57pm<b>teoriginalG</b> - the 09/23/2010 at 1:39pm<b>pureplastic90210</b> - the 09/22/2010 at 9:26pm<b>yankeeskid</b> - the 09/19/2010 at 7:23pm<b>Jovanah</b> - the 09/18/2010 at 11:19pm<b>dirtynsweet</b> - the 09/18/2010 at 10:35pm<b>Football_5tar_JR</b> - the 09/16/2010 at 2:46pm<b>Sexy_beast22</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 4:15pm

fuck_this_shit_5's FML badges

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fuck_this_shit_5's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother woke me up by saying "Good morning my sexually aggressive daughter. We're going to have an extremely uncomfortable conversation today." Our awkward talk consisted of her telling me that I'm a tease and am going to get raped. Why? She caught me making out with my boyfriend. FML

by wildthing / 07/01/2009 at 3:33pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting at the park with a friend when a small child approached us. Just as moved off the bridge to let the kid play, he asked if I would like to play the troll under the bridge. I laughed and said no thanks, to which the kid responded 'but there is nobody else ugly enough.' FML

by failure / 06/27/2009 at 9:00pm / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Kids

Today, I was surfing. I saw a cop writing a ticket for my car, I swam as fast as I could to stop him, I got caught in a wave, and smashed onto the rocks. I ended up with a huge bleeding scratch on my back, a broken surfboard, and a note saying that I had a flat tire. FML

by hatesurf / 06/26/2009 at 1:23pm / Peru (Lima) / Transportation

Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2009 at 12:01am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my older brother told me that no matter how fast you run at automatic sliding doors, they'll open in time. So I ran at a pair. They don't. FML

by kat9232000 / 06/19/2009 at 12:04am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the cafeteria of my school with my boyfriend and he dumped me. I was kinda expecting it. What I wasn't expecting was that he'd start running in front of everyone, screaming "FREEEEEEEEEDOM!" at the top of his lungs and that he'd kiss the first girl he saw. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2009 at 2:39am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML

by OhGeez / 06/08/2009 at 3:41pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2009 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cousin and I found out that when a girl puts a flower in the right side of her hair, it means she's available. The bigger the flower, the more available she is. My eleven year old boy cousin told me to cut down a palm tree and put it in my hair. FML

by Anonymous / 06/06/2009 at 8:38pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML

by imfromtexas02 / 06/06/2009 at 10:03am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I was taking a bath and out of boredom started making sheep noises. I then had a conversation with myself in farm animal noises. When I got out of the bath, I walked to my bedroom in my towel, passing the living room... where my little brother's soccer team burst out laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2009 at 5:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

by fmlfmlfml / 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML

by dearme / 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health