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fuck_this_shit_5

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fuck_this_shit_5

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 October 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3114
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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fuck_this_shit_5's page activity

Visits<b>iHazTheMuffinz</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 7:38pm<b>volleygirl16</b> - the 12/16/2011 at 10:17pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:40pm<b>Daileass</b> - the 02/04/2011 at 9:25am<b>LilAfo</b> - the 10/25/2010 at 4:42pm<b>BlackHawk214</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 7:08pm<b>MisterAmazing</b> - the 10/21/2010 at 2:02pm<b>jramos0070</b> - the 10/03/2010 at 2:08pm<b>lilauer13</b> - the 09/28/2010 at 3:57pm<b>teoriginalG</b> - the 09/23/2010 at 1:39pm<b>pureplastic90210</b> - the 09/22/2010 at 9:26pm<b>yankeeskid</b> - the 09/19/2010 at 7:23pm<b>Jovanah</b> - the 09/18/2010 at 11:19pm<b>dirtynsweet</b> - the 09/18/2010 at 10:35pm<b>Football_5tar_JR</b> - the 09/16/2010 at 2:46pm<b>Sexy_beast22</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 4:15pm<b>jackygirl2</b> - the 09/14/2010 at 8:45pm<b>Bliitz1</b> - the 09/13/2010 at 8:03am

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fuck_this_shit_5's favorite FMLs

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

#6842444
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39818) - you deserved it (3164)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27889) - you deserved it (6879)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year old guy. FML

#6763164
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7416) - you deserved it (28736)

On 12/15/2009 at 10:06am - misc - by wjones (man) - United States (California)

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11523) - you deserved it (36679)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML

#6644782
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10165) - you deserved it (35606)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by CH (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45526) - you deserved it (2967)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, I saw a squirrel beside a tree. Thinking it was cute, I stepped closer, picked up a pine cone and tried to lure it to come closer. After about two minutes of silently squatting on someone's lawn holding a pine cone, I realized the squirrel was dead. FML

#6391764
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23313) - you deserved it (13619)

On 11/21/2009 at 6:02pm - animals - by eyesightfail (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was walking to the parking lot from class while texting. When I looked up as I approached my parking spot, I noticed the words "F*ck you Dave" keyed into my car. Hi, my name is Clare. Who's Dave? FML

#6283457
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32254) - you deserved it (1779)

On 11/13/2009 at 1:35am - misc - by mynameis (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I returned home for the first time in a year, and found my entire computer missing. I asked my grandma about this, and she told me that she threw "the TV" away because it "no longer responded to the remote control." FML

#6270812
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37472) - you deserved it (2666)

On 11/12/2009 at 9:36am - misc - by missmycomp (man) - Singapore

Today, I saw an article that Burger King is selling a whopper with seven patties in celebration of the Windows Seven release. Upon reading this, I immediately got an extremely forceful erection. I think this is a sign to stop putting off that diet. FML

#6001058
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15201) - you deserved it (8940)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Brian (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

#5762381
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8085) - you deserved it (41602)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by BEE (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

#5724132
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41822) - you deserved it (3015)

On 10/08/2009 at 5:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, while I was getting it on with my girlfriend I accidentally called out "Mom" instead of her name. FML

#5579275
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9079) - you deserved it (37436)

On 10/01/2009 at 1:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

#5550225
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64312) - you deserved it (4709)

On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58361) - you deserved it (15061)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



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