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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was in the car with my 16 year old daughter. There was a guy on a fast looking motorcycle next to me at the stop light. I yelled to him to "get it up!" so that he would do a wheelie. Just before the light turned green he yelled back, "You're too old for me, but I'll get it up for her!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (5373) - you deserved it (17137)
On 02/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my heating broke. It's 22 degrees outside, and my father won't let us call someone to fix it because apparently the cold helps the soul grow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22321) - you deserved it (1872)
On 01/30/2010 at 1:45pm - misc - by vikhelios - Sent from mobile version
Today, after having been a vegetarian for 8 years because I'm opposed to cruelty to animals, I lost a bet and had to eat a whole cheeseburger. I loved it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8034) - you deserved it (39140)
On 01/29/2010 at 2:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33953) - you deserved it (9028)
On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found out I have a daughter. How did I find out? She added me on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41880) - you deserved it (12571)
On 01/26/2010 at 4:26pm - kids - by Nick (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, while babysitting, the little boy explained to me why I was single, reasons such as 'unattractive' and 'not the girlfriend type'. I cried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24635) - you deserved it (2879)
On 01/24/2010 at 6:58pm - kids - by owned (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33475) - you deserved it (2403)
On 01/24/2010 at 9:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5231) - you deserved it (23125)
On 01/22/2010 at 1:25am - intimacy - by masterzach21 (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's room with scented candles and surprise her when she was done showering. I lied there naked, with Kenny G playing softly. I heard a knock on the door, so I told her to come in. To my surprise it was her mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6079) - you deserved it (11810)
On 01/22/2010 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Toldyouso (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I had a wrestling match. Someone put Viagra in my waterbottle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39616) - you deserved it (3051)
On 01/22/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by wrestler133 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42744) - you deserved it (6374)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my grandma told me to fuck off when I tried to help her with the dishes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22962) - you deserved it (4696)
On 01/17/2010 at 1:31am - love - by volleyballgirl12 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20492) - you deserved it (3647)
On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26854) - you deserved it (2467)
On 01/10/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by wowhoopla - Sent from mobile version
Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20899) - you deserved it (9425)
On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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