forest1wolf

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forest1wolf

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1235
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About forest1wolf : Yes, I speak dog.

forest1wolf's page activity

Visits<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 1:39am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 2:57am<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 8:21pm<b>DaBayst</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 7:59am<b>djudge00</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 9:14am<b>LiLMizzerY</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 11:19am<b>Giraffegirl4563</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 11:16pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 4:07pm<b>Demonking</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 11:53am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 3:49am<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 5:05am<b>singer0421</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 6:16pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 3:05am<b>carolinacortes</b> - the 01/30/2013 at 7:10pm<b>MailMan11</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 10:12am<b>rhm2084</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 6:25am<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 03/07/2011 at 2:08pm

forest1wolf's FML badges

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Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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forest1wolf's favorite FMLs

Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2009 at 6:27am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, there was some teenage hoodlums outside in our parking lot. When I tell them to leave, one of the bigger guys steps up and says "I'll kick your ass!". I yell "No balls!", to the teen. He then whips me to the ground and sits on my face, proving to me that he did. FML

Today, my mom gave me a talk on safe sex. During a three hour car ride. With my friends in the back seat. FML

by Anonymous / 07/18/2009 at 1:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML

by RachelDC / 07/03/2009 at 3:06pm / United States (West Virginia) / Animals

Today, I facebooked my friends about my upcoming birthday party, and told them to keep the date free. I got several responses telling me that's not possible, because that's the day the new Harry Potter movie comes out. FML

by Anonymous / 06/16/2009 at 7:10am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

by iliketurtles / 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

by jessica / 02/17/2009 at 6:56pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

by The Sbeak / 02/13/2009 at 10:54am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML

by hahahehehohohoo / 02/06/2009 at 10:55pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML

by caroline / 02/06/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy