Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

firegirl1993

Offline (19 hours ago) | Search for a member

firegirl1993

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3011
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About firegirl1993 : A few things I flippin love:
Harry Potter, Sherlock, Doctor Who, MLP, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Merlin, Castle, and The Big Bang Theory.

Because I get asked a lot, I was born on the fourth of July, and a lot of people connect that to FIREcrackers, and so my user name is FIREgirl

firegirl1993's page activity

Visits<b>gingerJ</b> - 8 hours ago<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 6:49pm<b>imyy</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:05pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:23pm<b>chase201</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:17pm<b>hopsinlove17</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:18am<b>AdrastosArmor</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 3:07pm<b>rockytop33</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:13am<b>cats1116</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 6:42pm<b>Jameslicious</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:53am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 5:14am<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:52am<b>forsaken74</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 3:00am<b>daffidwilde</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 6:19am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 9:24am<b>Asian567</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 2:41pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 11:26pm

firegirl1993's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of firegirl1993's badges

firegirl1993's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

#20068529
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23887) - you deserved it (3653)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:03am - kids - by AGeeksWife (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my cousin suddenly confided in me that he had tried to commit suicide by overdosing when he was 17. Shocked and not knowing how to respond, I blurted out, "Did it work?" FML

#20068483
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8292) - you deserved it (29360)

On 09/12/2012 at 1:40am - misc - by hahagirl (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML

#20067539
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27829) - you deserved it (5805)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by apparently inexperienced (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML

#20066828
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6529) - you deserved it (26142)

On 09/10/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by mrs14 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML

#20056354
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17981) - you deserved it (23304)

On 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Loserbot (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my clumsiness has reached such legendary proportions in my family, that when I visited my grandparents, I found they'd put stickers all over their glass doors, so I wouldn't have "yet another painful accident". FML

#20052788
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16598) - you deserved it (4256)

On 09/01/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck yuo (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

#20049241
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32665) - you deserved it (1681)

On 08/30/2012 at 8:58am - misc - by Sarah - United States (New York)

Today, after a few weeks of smuggling a baby caterpillar into work every day just to make sure it ate and stayed alive long enough to turn into a butterfly, it finally did. Before it could fly free, a bird turned it into a snack. FML

#20033849
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23881) - you deserved it (5306)

On 08/21/2012 at 12:56pm - animals - by goodbyefriend - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

#20028986
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47375) - you deserved it (3357)

On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

#20026086
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24242) - you deserved it (1594)

On 08/17/2012 at 7:26am - animals - by byegeorge (woman) - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, while in the store with my kids, they wanted to buy tampons because I am "getting cranky, and it should be that time of the month." FML

#19988318
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9766) - you deserved it (18822)

On 07/28/2012 at 12:17am - kids - by love_to_live - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

#19936728
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18256) - you deserved it (4394)

On 07/14/2012 at 10:43am - health - by Anonymous - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML

#19936728
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18256) - you deserved it (4394)

On 07/14/2012 at 10:43am - health - by Anonymous - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

#19928978
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33255) - you deserved it (2834)

On 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm - misc - by LetItRip - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

#19919285
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26556) - you deserved it (2985)

On 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm - misc - by I_Has_A_Fishy - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: