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firegirl1993

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firegirl1993
  • Town/Country : Your Closet, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 2419
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About firegirl1993 : A few things I flippin love:
Harry Potter, Sherlock, Doctor Who, MLP, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Merlin, Castle, and The Big Bang Theory.

Because I get asked a lot, I was born on the fourth of July, and a lot of people connect that to FIREcrackers, and so my user name is FIREgirl

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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firegirl1993's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hanging out with the guy I like. All of a sudden, he pulls out a small vial of his blood to give to me, proving his undying love. Curious, I asked where he had gotten the blood. His answer? A razor blade. In his nose. FML

#15479009
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28999) - you deserved it (4854)

On 03/25/2011 at 4:50am - misc - by radicaloser - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42531) - you deserved it (6477)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML

#15447949
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15060) - you deserved it (29642)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by Cuzles (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML

#15447949
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15060) - you deserved it (29642)

On 03/23/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by Cuzles (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67068) - you deserved it (6316)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML

#14796617
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16877) - you deserved it (36426)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theshameofit (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12838) - you deserved it (34212) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38059) - you deserved it (25746) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

#14567167
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31797) - you deserved it (6817)

On 01/13/2011 at 3:48pm - kids - by me - United States

Today, I lied when my therapist asked why I preferred Tuesday morning appointments. It's actually because World of Warcraft is down for regularly scheduled maintenance. FML

#14034563
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9483) - you deserved it (31777)

On 11/30/2010 at 10:23am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML

#13945313
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20874) - you deserved it (11404)

On 11/23/2010 at 1:50am - intimacy - by Username -

Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he had ever cheated on me. In the most sincere and honest tone, he said "if I ever have or ever will, there's no way you would ever find out. I love you too much to lose you", and gave me a hug. FML

#13697546
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30485) - you deserved it (7151)

On 11/03/2010 at 2:40am - intimacy - by spockswifey - United States

Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML

#13588897
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8853) - you deserved it (58762)

On 10/25/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by leve80paladin (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he chose me out of all the hotter girls out there. He told me it's because I have great birthing hips. Apparently I'm having six children. FML

#13495933
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25519) - you deserved it (4768)

On 10/18/2010 at 5:06am - love - by louise. - Australia (New South Wales)



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