Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

firegirl1993

Offline (the 08/30/2014 at 8:24am) | Search for a member

firegirl1993

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3064
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About firegirl1993 : A few things I flippin love:
Harry Potter, Sherlock, Doctor Who, MLP, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Merlin, Castle, and The Big Bang Theory.

Because I get asked a lot, I was born on the fourth of July, and a lot of people connect that to FIREcrackers, and so my user name is FIREgirl

firegirl1993's page activity

Visits<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 7:49am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 6:49pm<b>imyy</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:05pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:23pm<b>chase201</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:17pm<b>hopsinlove17</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:18am<b>AdrastosArmor</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 3:07pm<b>rockytop33</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:13am<b>cats1116</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 6:42pm<b>Jameslicious</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:53am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 5:14am<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:52am<b>forsaken74</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 3:00am<b>daffidwilde</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 6:19am<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 9:24am<b>Asian567</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 2:41pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 11:26pm

firegirl1993's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of firegirl1993's badges

firegirl1993's favorite FMLs

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

#17779717
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54843) - you deserved it (5409)

On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29449) - you deserved it (8239)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML

#17746655
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26462) - you deserved it (5444)

On 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm - kids - by unknown - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

#17737717
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27963) - you deserved it (11469)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85180) - you deserved it (13065)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

#17708928
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28620) - you deserved it (3783)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

#17659578
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35956) - you deserved it (9402)

On 09/04/2011 at 5:36am - intimacy - by southernluxe - United States

Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I made hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML

#17642045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8642) - you deserved it (28413)

On 09/02/2011 at 3:48am - work - by dragos_dgt (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, my daughter turned Emo. FML

#17640475
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47865) - you deserved it (18390)

On 09/01/2011 at 11:44pm - kids - by nyaahaha - United States

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34849) - you deserved it (4395)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30922) - you deserved it (2970)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30922) - you deserved it (2970)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML

Today, I introduced my parrot to oranges. Now she makes a high pitched scream if I don't give her any, and I've just run out of oranges. FML

#17489385
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25009) - you deserved it (9974)

On 08/16/2011 at 11:00am - misc - by bursteardrums (woman) - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML

#17457057
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39280) - you deserved it (4222)

On 08/13/2011 at 2:37am - love - by bTOhno - United States (Oklahoma)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: