Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

firegirl1993

Offline (yesterday at 6:11am) | Search for a member

firegirl1993

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3556
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About firegirl1993 : A few things I flippin love:
Harry Potter, Sherlock, Doctor Who, MLP, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Merlin, Castle, and The Big Bang Theory.

Because I get asked a lot, I was born on the fourth of July, and a lot of people connect that to FIREcrackers, and so my user name is FIREgirl

firegirl1993's page activity

Visits<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 8:46am<b>Tthug</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 11:29am<b>julianbozikovic</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 1:02pm<b>Phaeno</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 11:33pm<b>15499kiwis</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:26pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 1:11pm<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:36am<b>SaxyRed</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:08am<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 7:49am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 6:49pm<b>imyy</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:05pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:23pm<b>chase201</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:17pm<b>hopsinlove17</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:18am<b>AdrastosArmor</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 3:07pm<b>rockytop33</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:13am<b>cats1116</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 6:42pm

firegirl1993's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of firegirl1993's badges

firegirl1993's favorite FMLs

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

#18698902
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33431) - you deserved it (5705)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

#18650275
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27243) - you deserved it (3855)

On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML

#18501609
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25510) - you deserved it (15912)

On 12/13/2011 at 7:26am - love - by reallyman__639 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML

#18496344
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (2658)

On 12/12/2011 at 6:17pm - intimacy - by flowerchildd2 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48649) - you deserved it (7736)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML

#18456086
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31470) - you deserved it (4474)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by journey_Jeanne - United States (California)

Today, I went to a concert. Being 6'5" was a great advantage because I could see the stage from wherever I was stood. On the downside, I was used by people as a meeting point. FML

#18447491
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27822) - you deserved it (3524)

On 12/06/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by jackgrant (man) - Iran Islamic Republic of

Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML

#18417405
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28443) - you deserved it (8746)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:03am - misc - by Sam - United States

Today, a private number called me telling me to "Beware the water bottles" as soon as a water bottle flew through my open window, hitting me. FML

#18408949
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25135) - you deserved it (2996)

On 12/02/2011 at 12:23am - misc - by waterbottlehit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44038) - you deserved it (3318)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32037) - you deserved it (15793)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him, he'll chop my body up and dispose of all the parts, but keep my boobies, because he likes them. FML

#18334603
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45063) - you deserved it (7023)

On 11/24/2011 at 5:01am - intimacy - by Faithful - Singapore

Today, my gynecologist told me that the ecosystem in my vagina is unbalanced, and that I have to do some reconstruction. Uhm what? FML

#18324369
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29191) - you deserved it (4548)

On 11/23/2011 at 4:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

#18280377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29102) - you deserved it (3748)

On 11/18/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by southernpride93 - United States (Florida)

Today, my recently ex-girlfriend's mother called me regarding her baby girl, saying, "If you mess with the chicklet, you mess with the momma hen." I have no idea what the hell this means for my future, but I'm a bit scared. FML

#18181651
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29271) - you deserved it (4864)

On 11/07/2011 at 2:20am - love - by roadkill0321 - United States



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: