Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

firegirl1993

Offline (the 10/19/2014 at 5:29am) | Search for a member

firegirl1993

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3363
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About firegirl1993 : A few things I flippin love:
Harry Potter, Sherlock, Doctor Who, MLP, Supernatural, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Merlin, Castle, and The Big Bang Theory.

Because I get asked a lot, I was born on the fourth of July, and a lot of people connect that to FIREcrackers, and so my user name is FIREgirl

firegirl1993's page activity

Visits<b>15499kiwis</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 5:26pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 1:11pm<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:36am<b>SaxyRed</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:08am<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 7:49am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 6:49pm<b>imyy</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:05pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:23pm<b>chase201</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:17pm<b>hopsinlove17</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:18am<b>AdrastosArmor</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 3:07pm<b>rockytop33</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 2:13am<b>cats1116</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 6:42pm<b>Jameslicious</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:53am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 5:14am<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:52am<b>forsaken74</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 3:00am

firegirl1993's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of firegirl1993's badges

firegirl1993's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that during fire drills, my school lines everyone up next to some extremely flammable and explosive propane tanks. If we ever have a real fire, we will all die. FML

#19164372
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28679) - you deserved it (2144)

On 02/25/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by afraidtoburn (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I fell and sprained my ankle while trying to step into my underwear. FML

#18904758
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24824) - you deserved it (5916)

On 01/25/2012 at 1:32am - health - by ???? - United States

Today, I went to get my blood drawn to see how far along I am pregnant. The lady stuck both my arms twice and then busted a vein in my right arm. She told me to come back tomorrow to try again. FML

#18875676
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26633) - you deserved it (1901)

On 01/21/2012 at 11:23pm - health - by Boo Boo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML

#18764509
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26501) - you deserved it (6234)

On 01/10/2012 at 4:36am - intimacy - by eakthegeek - United States

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33153) - you deserved it (9183)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

#18698902
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33393) - you deserved it (5702)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

#18650275
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27206) - you deserved it (3852)

On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML

#18501609
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25483) - you deserved it (15906)

On 12/13/2011 at 7:26am - love - by reallyman__639 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, a creepy old guy on the bus asked me if I wanted to "lick it." When I said no, he tried to convince me by telling me that "it tastes good." FML

#18496344
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30665) - you deserved it (2574)

On 12/12/2011 at 6:17pm - intimacy - by flowerchildd2 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48602) - you deserved it (7728)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML

#18456086
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31432) - you deserved it (4472)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by journey_Jeanne - United States (California)

Today, I went to a concert. Being 6'5" was a great advantage because I could see the stage from wherever I was stood. On the downside, I was used by people as a meeting point. FML

#18447491
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27779) - you deserved it (3521)

On 12/06/2011 at 8:01pm - misc - by jackgrant (man) - Iran Islamic Republic of

Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML

#18417405
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27643) - you deserved it (8627)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:03am - misc - by Sam - United States

Today, a private number called me telling me to "Beware the water bottles" as soon as a water bottle flew through my open window, hitting me. FML

#18408949
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (2990)

On 12/02/2011 at 12:23am - misc - by waterbottlehit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43251) - you deserved it (3242)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: