About firecopy : Years on FML: 6
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Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19943) - you deserved it (911)
On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my husband started getting frisky, but I wasn't in the mood, so I said I'd just like to cuddle and talk. He decided a good topic of conversation was whether or not it would be physically possible to smoke my grandma's ashes from the cremation urn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14567) - you deserved it (7820)
On 03/14/2012 at 9:32pm - misc - by solyana vr1 - United States
Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22493) - you deserved it (12957)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)
Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10582) - you deserved it (35215)
On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was woken up by my neighbour's dog losing its mind, and I remembered reading a story about someone ignoring a dog and later finding out that their car had been stolen. Paranoid, I went outside to check on mine. Nope. Just the damn dog barking at one thirty in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13298) - you deserved it (2471)
On 03/05/2012 at 5:28am - misc - by DamnDogs (woman) - Canada
Today, I couldn’t have a conversation with my fiancé unless it was about Dragon Ball Z. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16184) - you deserved it (5030)
On 02/20/2012 at 10:53am - love - by DBZ (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was talking to a guy I really liked, hoping that he would ask me out. Eventually he asked for my number. I was so excited that I couldn't remember it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17618) - you deserved it (5712)
On 02/16/2012 at 2:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, it appears that it's Single Loser Awareness Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18018) - you deserved it (4477)
On 02/14/2012 at 10:32am - love - by crazytown62 - United States
Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8016) - you deserved it (41495)
On 02/13/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by SpLo0gIeR - United States
Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7808) - you deserved it (53709)
On 02/12/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by Alyssa - United States
Today, I have to follow through with the bet I lost over the Super Bowl game. I don't have a problem running a lap nude around my block, but the cops in the police station right across from my house probably will. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7104) - you deserved it (20548)
On 02/07/2012 at 12:58pm - misc - by MillyMan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20397) - you deserved it (1237)
On 02/06/2012 at 4:43pm - health - by Marc - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I argued with my girlfriend over her constantly wasting our money on acupuncture. She said if I could prove it was baloney, she would stop. After I showed her copious amounts of scientific proof debunking it as pseudo-science, she told me we're "taking a break" from our relationship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19153) - you deserved it (9669)
On 02/03/2012 at 9:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33581) - you deserved it (6845)
On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a parking ticket for parking in my neighbors' parking spot. I parked there because my neighbors were parked in my parking spot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22929) - you deserved it (1471)
On 02/02/2012 at 5:28am - money - by carssuck - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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