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fightingkittens

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fightingkittens

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12649
  • Number of comments : 243
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Caroline1812</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 10:06pm<b>frogpotatoz088</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 6:15pm<b>broncosfan1996</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 10:29pm<b>ImDoghouse</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 11:13pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:54pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 11:11am<b>bjf21</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 11:39pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 12:06pm<b>anshu0688</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 1:02am<b>ProximityToDeath</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 11:42pm<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 4:07pm<b>lilimae2002</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 1:54am<b>allie2590</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 8:02am<b>Scryll</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:52pm<b>mill2775</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:22pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 5:18pm<b>Flippier999</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 4:05pm

Fucked!<b>lilimae2002</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:54am<b>mill2775</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:22am<b>myelias25</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 9:08am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:56am<b>robertd73</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 2:26pm<b>kiwifruitred</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 2:28pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 1:12am

fightingkittens's FML badges

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of fightingkittens's badges

fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML

#20469816
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28206) - you deserved it (4447)

On 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36536) - you deserved it (3555)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML

#20456974
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38572) - you deserved it (4825)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by Mary - Czech Republic

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32199) - you deserved it (9004)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27104) - you deserved it (5361)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML

#20439162
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31850) - you deserved it (13963)

On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML

#20423470
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40103) - you deserved it (4043)

On 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83968) - you deserved it (25897)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, my co-worker had a bad cold that stuffed up his ears and nose. This wouldn't have been a problem, except that he believed his farts were silent and scentless. They were so vile, they could have killed a horse. FML

#20413058
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33595) - you deserved it (2848)

On 12/22/2012 at 3:06am - work - by Iknoweverything (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

Today, I was bartending. A guest was getting belligerent so I had to cut him off. He called me a bitch and threw the rest of his drink in my face before storming off. The belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend. FML

#20193528
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24217) - you deserved it (4118)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50am - love - by FMyEx - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28943) - you deserved it (3117)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML

#20183521
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22207) - you deserved it (3018)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, drunk at a party, I leaned through a window to throw up. I was outside. FML

#20182175
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8831) - you deserved it (28625) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/28/2012 at 1:20am - health - by kise - Sent from mobile version

Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked in on my wife fingering herself to a copy of War and Peace. FML

#20178424
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34198) - you deserved it (4107)

On 11/25/2012 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)



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