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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16146
  • Number of comments : 252
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>racquel1115</b> - 22 hours ago<b>Slayer9805</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 4:15pm<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 11:54pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:56pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 2:08pm<b>ionab101</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 8:06am<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 2:24am<b>liebe_lule</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 6:44am<b>depressedpianist</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 10:57pm<b>marisol180</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 12:13am<b>Mons</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 7:08pm<b>guzzerz89</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 6:54pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 2:29pm<b>mcduckens</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 11:03am<b>Mentally_Artsy</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 10:17am<b>Unlovable_Me</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 10:11am<b>ncbb5</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 9:41am<b>SilverStillwater</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 9:18am

Fucked!<b>delfino1604</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:30pm<b>Um_bye</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:18am<b>BlueHorizons</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:52am<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 5:22am<b>warrenhoward42</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:20am<b>Matheo</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:13pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 1:18pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 3:41am<b>Geekman2</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:44pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 3:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:15am<b>lex1459</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:05am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:37am<b>just_dorky_me</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Raltizal</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 10:21am<b>lilimae2002</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:54am<b>mill2775</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:22am<b>myelias25</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 9:08am

fightingkittens's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.


Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

See all of fightingkittens's badges

fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45071) - you deserved it (5676)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, my online order arrived earlier than I expected. I opened it to find some kind of anal sex toy. Whoever this is for is going to be disappointed when they get my 3DS game. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41504) - you deserved it (2879)

On 09/24/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59227) - you deserved it (29454)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I had sex with a guy wearing a KFC uniform. Hat included. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24697) - you deserved it (71671)

On 09/11/2013 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by lyfisdyno - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52727) - you deserved it (3433)

On 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43787) - you deserved it (2658)

On 09/06/2013 at 3:01am - work - by lifesucks0925 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took my laptop to I.T. to fix my internet. Only after I left did I realise my memory technique for remembering the stages of mitosis (Iraqi penis man anally transmits chlamydia) was left as a sticky note on my desktop. The guy definitely noticed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35704) - you deserved it (11298)

On 09/04/2013 at 7:18am - misc - by interphaseprophasemetaphase (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (46250) - you deserved it (7769)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, my 50-year-old dad was in a foul mood after taking an online test that put him in Slytherin house instead of Ravenclaw where he "belongs" because he's "so smart". FML


I agree, your life sucks (40280) - you deserved it (3520)

On 08/22/2013 at 9:38pm - misc - by thanksad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45218) - you deserved it (14621)

On 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm - animals - by violated ._. (woman) - United States

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45640) - you deserved it (3215)

On 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm - work - by twatstick (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my ass decided that it was the perfect day to exhibit the diarrhea side-effect of medicine I'm taking. I definitely made a lasting impression on my interviewer. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41207) - you deserved it (2823)

On 08/20/2013 at 1:18pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got sent home early because a large fire broke out at work. I was greeted by the sight of my cocktard of a "boyfriend" making out on my sofa with another woman. He actually had the audacity and brass balls to claim he thought she was me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (58065) - you deserved it (3959)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:40pm - love - by why yes, I do mean "ex-boyfriend" (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)

Today, I went on a new medicine. One of the listed side-effects was "anal seepage" and I spent the better part of the day laughing with my coworkers about how it's "not a real side-effect". I found out that it really is while stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the way home. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42092) - you deserved it (9864)

On 08/15/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by stinky car - United States (Alabama)

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Friday 27 November 2015

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