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fightingkittens

Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 8:56am) | Search for a member

fightingkittens

29Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17002
  • Number of comments : 253
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>cornyrob</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 5:31pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:07pm<b>davidpropert</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 7:41pm<b>Goodliife</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 4:59am<b>pop17123</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 9:07am<b>Ninjahiga</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 10:30am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 1:37am<b>Silentshdw13</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:55am<b>ImaKoala</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:34am<b>Tenker</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:36pm<b>caliguy08</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 6:29pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 3:43pm<b>Bricktothehead</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 12:21pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 12:19pm<b>biggins224</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:33am<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:56am<b>marshm610</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:40am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:35am

Fucked!<b>pop17123</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:07pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 1:12pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 8:35pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 4:05pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 6:39pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 11:59pm<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 8:36am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:30pm<b>Um_bye</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:18am<b>BlueHorizons</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:52am<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 5:22am<b>warrenhoward42</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:20am<b>Matheo</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:13pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 1:18pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 3:41am<b>Geekman2</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:44pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 3:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:15am

fightingkittens's FML badges

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How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

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fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother, my aunt, and my two sisters are all on their periods. I can't even brush my teeth in my own house without being treated like a criminal. FML

#13641509
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45794) - you deserved it (5081)

On 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was having the most wonderful bath. The water was steaming, the bubbles were bubbly, and I was reading a really good book. I put my book down to yawn and looked to my right. My gaze was met by the lovely face of my brother's pet tarantula. FML

#13574162
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36264) - you deserved it (3210)

On 10/24/2010 at 8:21am - misc - by mzgabbster (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, before a big client pitch I went into their office bathroom to quickly slick down my hair. It had two identical automatic faucets, one for water and one for hand soap. Now my hair is full of soap, and smells like industrial strength lavender. FML

#13548383
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9497) - you deserved it (29334)

On 10/22/2010 at 9:26am - work - by soapypete (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I teach English in Taiwan. I got two new students, brothers named Harry and Potter. People, they're children, not pets. FML

#13541967
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33704) - you deserved it (4875)

On 10/21/2010 at 9:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm going on an 8 hour drive with my insane family. This usually means screaming arguments, graphic conversations about my dad's pubes, some karaoke, plenty of farting, some stale Pringles, and an obese golden retriever on my lap the entire time. Arizona, here we come. FML

#13495901
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30699) - you deserved it (3904)

On 10/18/2010 at 4:56am - misc - by fmmlll (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was told I look like Susan Boyle. FML

#13462690
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38008) - you deserved it (5707)

On 10/15/2010 at 7:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, as I put my 4 year old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

#13450247
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25276) - you deserved it (8870)

On 10/14/2010 at 8:25pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I called my mom for her birthday. She started talking about an infomercial she'd seen for a combo bidet-and-dryer, and how she would like to get one so she can feel "fresh down there" without worrying about getting bits of toilet paper on her nether regions. I can't un-hear this. FML

#13415843
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27367) - you deserved it (2923)

On 10/12/2010 at 1:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML

#13269256
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30042) - you deserved it (4261)

On 09/30/2010 at 9:55pm - love - by dontask (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried to get over my childhood phobia of syringes by donating blood. The phlebotomist hadn't even touched the needle before I started sobbing hysterically. They made me leave. FML

#13219092
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23037) - you deserved it (13214)

On 09/27/2010 at 3:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML

#13169331
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11988) - you deserved it (36217)

On 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I came home to find my drunken father sitting on our front lawn. He had a blanket, lit candle, and was singing with his eyes closed. He told me he believed he was Buddha from watching the history channel. Meanwhile, cars were driving by our house beeping, and yelling "praise the lord!" FML

#13120508
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26425) - you deserved it (2750)

On 09/19/2010 at 10:13pm - misc - by embaressed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was bringing the garbage cans inside and noticed one felt a little heavy. I opened it, only to find a raccoon. A very angry raccoon. FML

#13094765
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32696) - you deserved it (2783)

On 09/18/2010 at 2:31am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom was going through the newspaper and cutting out coupons for me to use. She hands me two of them, one for tampons and the other for a pregnancy test saying "well, you're gonna need one or the other this month." FML

#13083342
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27060) - you deserved it (7143)

On 09/17/2010 at 4:19am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42336) - you deserved it (10210)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)



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