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fightingkittens

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fightingkittens

12Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14923
  • Number of comments : 243
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 8:35am<b>revolutionbabe</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 4:23am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 4:21pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 6:19pm<b>thatnakedguy</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 11:30am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 7:13am<b>seninaa</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 3:50am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 9:50am<b>lex1459</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 2:06am<b>saladbar401</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 5:44pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 2:26pm<b>Woody02284</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 7:28pm<b>dannnngthatsux</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 11:37am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:37pm<b>kcoffey_69</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 5:03am<b>pavingboy</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 10:17am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 4:14pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 11:27am

Fucked!<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:15am<b>lex1459</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:05am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:37am<b>just_dorky_me</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Raltizal</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 10:21am<b>lilimae2002</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:54am<b>mill2775</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:22am<b>myelias25</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 9:08am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:56am<b>robertd73</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 2:26pm<b>kiwifruitred</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 2:28pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 1:12am

fightingkittens's FML badges

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of fightingkittens's badges

fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML

#16367769
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27257) - you deserved it (7388)

On 05/27/2011 at 1:26am - misc - by moe - United States

Today, I had to give a 63 year old man a shot. He started bawling before I even brought out the needle. I tried to get him calm down. Then he grabbed the needle, threw it at me and ran out the door. FML

#16365473
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32177) - you deserved it (3037)

On 05/26/2011 at 11:05pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I witnessed the miracle of life. More specifically, my cat giving birth on my bed at four in the morning. FML

#16359645
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35834) - you deserved it (7046)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:03pm - animals - by KittenTime (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35670) - you deserved it (21537)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I had a parent-teacher conference with my 8 year old son. He'd written "Chuck Norris" as the answer for every question on his test. FML

#16217085
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39001) - you deserved it (10511)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:54am - kids - by yobruh -

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

#16161351
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40413) - you deserved it (10196)

On 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by f*cks_sake - United States (Ohio)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
253 comments

Today, at 11 weeks pregnant, I excitedly told my best friend that my baby now has fingernails. Her response was, "You're beginning to sound like a pro-life bumper sticker." FML

#16031516
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23983) - you deserved it (18690)

On 05/03/2011 at 11:41am - misc - by CRH (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

#15947062
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14396) - you deserved it (41291)

On 04/27/2011 at 9:35am - kids - by BadgerSpirit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, it's been 5 years I've been working for a man that won't admit he has Tourette's. He sits at his desk, twitching his head and hissing like a snake. He's also randomly said things like 'nipples', 'Jessica Simpson', 'potato peeler', etc. I feel like it's become my job to warn new employees. FML

#15858383
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31820) - you deserved it (4444)

On 04/20/2011 at 11:25am - work - by ShakeRattleHiss (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my cat took a shit in my toaster. FML

#15852262
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52534) - you deserved it (8339)

On 04/19/2011 at 10:21pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was in the emergency room. The doctor told me that my injuries and back problems are the intensity of those after a car accident. I slipped on a grape. FML

#15691583
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37972) - you deserved it (5206)

On 04/08/2011 at 6:35am - health - by ridella -

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35002) - you deserved it (6862)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I co-starred in a production of Hamlet. Halfway through play, the actor playing Hamlet forgot his lines, threw a raging temper tantrum, screaming about how much he hated the play and how he wanted to go home in front of hundreds of audience members. FML

#15497521
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34288) - you deserved it (3361)

On 03/26/2011 at 11:41am - misc - by Sue (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML

#15432254
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47335) - you deserved it (4465)

On 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm - work - by Kim - United States (Pennsylvania)



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