Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

fightingkittens

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

fightingkittens

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7060
  • Number of comments : 240
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Does anyone else find it mildly disturbing that they not only publish the date but the day of your birth?

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>NotAUser</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 2:00pm<b>Seabiscuit218</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 9:03am<b>baconburger300</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 1:50pm<b>RoVeR_2000</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 6:45pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 5:33pm<b>Scarylizard1798</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:59am<b>gingerJ</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 11:05am<b>ladycarousel</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 9:14pm<b>SpeedToast</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 10:49am<b>Vball6</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:55am<b>Cruzg2017</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 11:53pm<b>cattturine</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 1:33am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 9:18pm<b>Reva750</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:11pm<b>Articulation</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 2:54am<b>addictedtoIASIP</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:01am<b>Raxal</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:52pm<b>tg1tg1</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 11:44am

fightingkittens's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of fightingkittens's badges

fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, a riot broke out while I was on shift at the community swimming pool. A family snuck in soap so they could use the pool as a giant bath tub. FML

#16950296
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30925) - you deserved it (2365)

On 07/02/2011 at 3:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML

#16908147
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10117) - you deserved it (77755)

On 06/29/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by ashleyrae (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I stepped in a turd. Not a dog turd, my grandmother's turd. FML

#16900217
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44586) - you deserved it (4194)

On 06/28/2011 at 4:40pm - animals - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, I was driving when a guy in a truck swerved in front of me. I didn't realize I'd sworn until I'd come to a red light and my one year old daughter yelled her own version of what I said. She now yells "Chicken in the hole!" whenever the car comes to a stop. FML

#16867812
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9810) - you deserved it (24359)

On 06/26/2011 at 4:47pm - kids - by Mommy - United States (Oregon)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38779) - you deserved it (15597)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had to go to a birthday party for 10 year old triplets. They've all been dead for more than 9 years. FML

#16755181
389 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39668) - you deserved it (5970)

On 06/20/2011 at 12:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I have an eight hour transatlantic flight and the person sitting next to me has already filled his third sick bag. This wouldn't be quite so bad were we not still at the terminal with passengers still boarding the plane. FML

#16714444
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31454) - you deserved it (2124)

On 06/17/2011 at 4:23pm - misc - by ajdown (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, as I was smoking a cigarette I realized that it's time to quit. This realization came to me after a particularly violent coughing bout forced not tar out of my lungs, but rather poo out of my bum. FML

#16701794
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9013) - you deserved it (43501)

On 06/16/2011 at 9:39pm - health - by Hopslammer (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while driving in a funeral procession I was distracted, missed my turn and yelled "God dammit!" I'm the funeral director; the Priest was in the car with me as I led the funeral the wrong way. FML

#16659246
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13924) - you deserved it (35719)

On 06/14/2011 at 10:23am - work - by patrickalamo - United States (Texas)

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

#16591385
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38846) - you deserved it (4295)

On 06/10/2011 at 4:09am - work - by lilben (man) - United States (California)

Today, on my way home from work, I decided to bring my pregnant wife a bouquet of roses to surprise her. Her response? "Why didn't you get me something useful, like chicken wings, instead?" FML

#16583514
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40197) - you deserved it (9644)

On 06/09/2011 at 7:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my family went and visited my nan. She ushered me in close and asked, "When are you going to knock it off with all this emo cockshite?" FML

#16499579
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13931) - you deserved it (41831)

On 06/04/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by Flarewolf (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my family went and visited my nan. She ushered me in close and asked, "When are you going to knock it off with all this emo cockshite?" FML

#16499579
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13931) - you deserved it (41831)

On 06/04/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by Flarewolf (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML

#16367769
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24803) - you deserved it (7014)

On 05/27/2011 at 1:26am - misc - by moe - United States

Today, I had to give a 63 year old man a shot. He started bawling before I even brought out the needle. I tried to get him calm down. Then he grabbed the needle, threw it at me and ran out the door. FML

#16365473
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29327) - you deserved it (2842)

On 05/26/2011 at 11:05pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: