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fightingkittens

Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 8:56am) | Search for a member

fightingkittens

29Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16918
  • Number of comments : 253
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:07pm<b>davidpropert</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 7:41pm<b>Goodliife</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 4:59am<b>pop17123</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 9:07am<b>Ninjahiga</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 10:30am<b>CandyDawg</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 1:37am<b>Silentshdw13</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:55am<b>ImaKoala</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:34am<b>Tenker</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:36pm<b>caliguy08</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 6:29pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 3:43pm<b>Bricktothehead</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 12:21pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 12:19pm<b>biggins224</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:33am<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:56am<b>marshm610</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:40am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:35am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:23am

Fucked!<b>pop17123</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:07pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 1:12pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 8:35pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 4:05pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 6:39pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 11:59pm<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 8:36am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:30pm<b>Um_bye</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:18am<b>BlueHorizons</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:52am<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 5:22am<b>warrenhoward42</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:20am<b>Matheo</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:13pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 1:18pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 3:41am<b>Geekman2</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:44pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 3:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:15am

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

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fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was in the shower, my very drunken mother came home. She then barged into the shower with me, still completely clothed, and gave me the longest, most awkward hug of a lifetime. After she left me still in shock, she came back and did it again. FML

#18342108
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31350) - you deserved it (2657)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:12pm - misc - by hannahlorraine - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's family. Her mother wants us to stay in separate bedrooms, and I was happy to oblige since I'm staying at their house. But because there isn't an extra room, we have to stay together. Upon entering the house, her mom searched our bags for condoms and birth-control pills. FML

#18341424
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34812) - you deserved it (3189)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:09pm - intimacy - by vistingherfamily (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my brother lost his first tooth, so I told him the tooth fairy is going to give him money. He now thinks The Rock is going to show up in his room. FML

#18327184
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34058) - you deserved it (6769)

On 11/23/2011 at 2:14pm - kids - by G. Briones -

Today, my gynecologist told me that the ecosystem in my vagina is unbalanced, and that I have to do some reconstruction. Uhm what? FML

#18324369
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32848) - you deserved it (4965)

On 11/23/2011 at 4:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36675) - you deserved it (3416)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38622) - you deserved it (6556)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was practicing my lines for theater class in the hall. My partner and I chose a script where we argue over me stealing her boyfriend. Since it started to sound like a real argument, another student said that I was a "crazy bitch" and punched me in the face. FML

#18279897
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38046) - you deserved it (4228)

On 11/18/2011 at 8:30am - misc - by hannahk267 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30769) - you deserved it (8491)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

#18254436
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14358) - you deserved it (61307)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:16am - kids - by Margo (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML

#18254256
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29440) - you deserved it (16789)

On 11/15/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by yuck - United Kingdom (Bolton)

Today, "Community" was pulled from its mid-season lineup, with plans to hopefully put it back on the schedule at some unknown time. It will probably be canceled. Meanwhile, "Whitney" is still on the air and doing fine. FML

#18253650
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26251) - you deserved it (7436)

On 11/15/2011 at 5:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found an old jock strap in my tuba. FML

#18244771
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26766) - you deserved it (4137)

On 11/14/2011 at 8:23am - misc - by jocksblow - United States

Today, I carpooled with my co-worker whose girlfriend has left him. The radio was playing the song "Jar of Hearts." He then began to sing intensely, and broke down crying. FML

#18244080
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30361) - you deserved it (3105)

On 11/14/2011 at 3:45am - work - by Anon - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34457) - you deserved it (2825)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML

#18187794
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6701) - you deserved it (52859)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by farhia97 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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