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fightingkittens

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fightingkittens

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14031
  • Number of comments : 243
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>saladbar401</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 4:28pm<b>pavingboy</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 10:17am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 4:14pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 11:27am<b>just_dorky_me</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 1:19pm<b>Joel541</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 8:27am<b>vikingchick</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 9:23pm<b>Flippier999</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:44am<b>jacky75</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 8:48pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:52am<b>IniestaRox</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 8:56am<b>blubje</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 10:08am<b>Jabiepilot</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 1:50am<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:40am<b>Raltizal</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:21am<b>deaconsmom</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 3:49am<b>Nubbington1402</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 12:23am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 7:51am

Fucked!<b>just_dorky_me</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Raltizal</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 10:21am<b>lilimae2002</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:54am<b>mill2775</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:22am<b>myelias25</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 9:08am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:56am<b>robertd73</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 2:26pm<b>kiwifruitred</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 2:28pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 1:12am

fightingkittens's FML badges

Facebook

Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of fightingkittens's badges

fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33081) - you deserved it (2721)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML

#18187794
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6187) - you deserved it (50958)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by farhia97 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

#18182863
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28912) - you deserved it (3531)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:24am - work - by Dlord357 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though, with my cat. FML

#18145611
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24598) - you deserved it (9389)

On 11/03/2011 at 6:56am - animals - by Nicole557 (woman) - United States

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29561) - you deserved it (3441)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

#18095977
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26791) - you deserved it (4931)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

#18086804
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13713) - you deserved it (35029)

On 10/27/2011 at 2:41am - misc - by Deborah - United States

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

#18070582
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28761) - you deserved it (34142)

On 10/25/2011 at 6:15am - intimacy - by sad - Reserved

Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML

#18069219
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28217) - you deserved it (1903)

On 10/25/2011 at 12:30am - work - by fire1 (man) - United States (California)

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

#18067303
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44031) - you deserved it (3351)

On 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm - misc - by KaySchrages92 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

#18051286
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43729) - you deserved it (19799)

On 10/23/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by canucks_chick - Canada

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

#18044688
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (16874) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/22/2011 at 8:40am - kids - by titoutou222 - France

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

#18037995
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49864) - you deserved it (3883)

On 10/21/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by prostitutes boyfriend - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

#18022351
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33202) - you deserved it (6454)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:03am - kids - by optimistic2628 - United States

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

#18015213
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53627) - you deserved it (8340)

On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)



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