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fightingkittens

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fightingkittens
  • Town/Country : Los Angeles, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 5208
  • Number of comments : 238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Does anyone else find it mildly disturbing that they not only publish the date but the day of your birth?

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fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML

#19030539
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19391) - you deserved it (9068)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

#19023542
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22364) - you deserved it (3420)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my downstairs neighbor died. I knew because the smell wafted up to my apartment. FML

#19008495
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25720) - you deserved it (2100)

On 02/06/2012 at 5:38am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that he should sing that song that goes 'I'm too sexy for my shirt' when we have sex. Now, every time that we have sex, that song is going to be stuck in my head. FML

#19005217
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7411) - you deserved it (33545)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by tkr (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to explain to my 18-year-old daughter why she can't pull a duck face pose for her driver's license. She still doesn't believe me. FML

#18982251
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27261) - you deserved it (3688)

On 02/03/2012 at 2:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

#18976293
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15366) - you deserved it (19658)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

#18976293
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15366) - you deserved it (19658)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML

#18966700
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26807) - you deserved it (3383)

On 02/01/2012 at 3:19am - intimacy - by crybaby - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

#18964784
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40565) - you deserved it (3580)

On 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm - misc - by sorrygrandma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I cut my finger with a plastic knife while demonstrating that you can't cut yourself with a plastic knife. FML

#18951415
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9403) - you deserved it (38770)

On 01/30/2012 at 10:27am - health - by cbad (woman) - United States

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

#18946444
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20047) - you deserved it (9357)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my parents had a long discussion on whether a cut on my arm looked like a vagina. FML

#18921223
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20385) - you deserved it (1914)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:07pm - misc - by HylianFox (woman) - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

#18915455
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10411) - you deserved it (20254)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:45am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my family had dinner with my future in-laws for the first time. After a bottle of wine to herself, my mother loudly insisted that I'm out of her will. Apparently, I "molest towels" and leave them to "fester for days" in my "den of depravity". I'm sure they'll give me their daughter now. FML

#18914939
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20810) - you deserved it (2480)

On 01/26/2012 at 9:49am - love - by The Towel Molester (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I received a package from an unknown address. Inside were doll heads and cigarette butts. FML

#18903953
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23061) - you deserved it (1531)

On 01/24/2012 at 11:51pm - misc - by JellitonOctopus - United States (California)



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