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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15522
  • Number of comments : 249
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>saladbar401</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 6:16pm<b>wangwong</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 11:27pm<b>qwertydude1</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 11:44pm<b>AnonymousBella</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 10:59pm<b>aswethinkweiz</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 11:29pm<b>doggybonez66</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 12:58pm<b>Hollywood_Marine</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 8:19pm<b>Xquisite1</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 10:30pm<b>Girlshotdown1</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 7:24am<b>meatball4122</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:46pm<b>Spyderbane</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:45pm<b>rogerover</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:13pm<b>youarehigh</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 9:56pm<b>bandaidstations</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 8:46pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 8:29pm<b>jedijesus</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 6:41pm<b>Dexter83</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 6:01pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 5:01pm

Fucked!<b>BlueHorizons</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:52am<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 5:22am<b>warrenhoward42</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:20am<b>Matheo</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:13pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 1:18pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 3:41am<b>Geekman2</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:44pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 3:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:15am<b>lex1459</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:05am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:37am<b>just_dorky_me</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Raltizal</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 10:21am<b>lilimae2002</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:54am<b>mill2775</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:22am<b>myelias25</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 9:08am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:56am<b>robertd73</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 2:26pm

fightingkittens's FML badges


Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of fightingkittens's badges

fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13586) - you deserved it (38093)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by pride? what's that? :( (woman) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, at college, we had a substitute philosophy teacher, because our professor is on bereavement leave. During his presentation, the sub managed to segue from the early works of Immanuel Kant straight into "the myth of the vaginal orgasm." I'm still shocked and highly confused. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19511) - you deserved it (1923)

On 08/31/2012 at 7:40pm - misc - by what.....? (woman) - United States

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (26379) - you deserved it (2293)

On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25651) - you deserved it (2095)

On 08/14/2012 at 11:02am - love - by WELLFUCKYOUTOO (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my grandma, who's tried to ruin every relationship to date, stood up and shouted that "it ain't right", "you're too good for her", and claimed my fiancée has been cheating on me, before she was finally ejected from the building. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27042) - you deserved it (1740)

On 08/13/2012 at 6:12pm - love - by impickingyourhomegran (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I realized that if I died tomorrow, the only photos available for my funeral would be crappy family Christmas portraits, acne-filled yearbook photos, and several pictures from my MySpace days, where I'm sporting coontails and looking paler than Edward Cullen's ass. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19980) - you deserved it (7739)

On 08/12/2012 at 1:31pm - misc - by kherien (woman) - United States

Today, while doing my job as a cart clerk, a gentleman went around the parking lot and picked some trash up, trying to help out. Faith in humanity: +1. About an hour later I saw a woman pick a bug off of her windshield and eat it. Faith in humanity: -200. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25012) - you deserved it (2526)

On 08/08/2012 at 7:23am - work - by TJ (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23750) - you deserved it (2454)

On 08/07/2012 at 5:19am - health - by TheCerealKiller - United States (California)

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a social visit to my slightly deranged grandpa. I ended up politely sitting through two hours of him lecturing me on how he "invented the modern tap", then on how sex is an Illuminati invention to "give sluts the STDs they need to kill us all". FML


I agree, your life sucks (19628) - you deserved it (1904)

On 08/03/2012 at 7:50pm - misc - by yeah okay then (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I cleaned the toilet so vigorously that I snapped the handle of the brush. I laughed and told the rest of my family. Instead of joining in on the hilarity, my mother screamed, "We have had that toilet brush for twenty-six years!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (28832) - you deserved it (2818)

On 08/01/2012 at 3:59am - misc - by SLAB_GIRL15 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25364) - you deserved it (1620)

On 07/31/2012 at 9:54pm - work - by kaitlyna15 - United States (Washington)

Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23886) - you deserved it (1883)

On 07/31/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by lotd - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22308) - you deserved it (4377)

On 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm - animals - by soph511 (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I was walking home from work, when a clearly homeless guy who smelled like Jimmy Hoffa's colon grabbed me, pinned me to a wall, and demanded that I hand over my "booty". I don't know whether or not I was mugged by Jack Sparrow, but either way, he's now over £100 richer. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21257) - you deserved it (2221)

On 07/27/2012 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Midlothian)

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