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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15562
  • Number of comments : 249
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About fightingkittens : Once upon a time I had an FML published. Unfortunately I neglected to make a proper sacrifice of watermelons and chimney sweeps to the All-Sentient Sniping and Hissing Ovarian Longitudinal Entity and as a result of this grievance, it was never credited to my profile. You can find it by searching "staph infection" in the search bar--the name on the account is accurate.

fightingkittens's page activity

Visits<b>saladbar401</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 6:16pm<b>wangwong</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 11:27pm<b>qwertydude1</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 11:44pm<b>AnonymousBella</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 10:59pm<b>aswethinkweiz</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 11:29pm<b>doggybonez66</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 12:58pm<b>Hollywood_Marine</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 8:19pm<b>Xquisite1</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 10:30pm<b>Girlshotdown1</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 7:24am<b>meatball4122</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:46pm<b>Spyderbane</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:45pm<b>rogerover</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:13pm<b>youarehigh</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 9:56pm<b>bandaidstations</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 8:46pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 8:29pm<b>jedijesus</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 6:41pm<b>Dexter83</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 6:01pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 5:01pm

Fucked!<b>BlueHorizons</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 7:52am<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 5:22am<b>warrenhoward42</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:20am<b>Matheo</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 11:13pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 1:18pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 3:41am<b>Geekman2</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:44pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 3:39pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:15am<b>lex1459</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 8:05am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:37am<b>just_dorky_me</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:19pm<b>Raltizal</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 10:21am<b>lilimae2002</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:54am<b>mill2775</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:22am<b>myelias25</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 9:08am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:56am<b>robertd73</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 2:26pm

fightingkittens's FML badges


Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of fightingkittens's badges

fightingkittens's favorite FMLs

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53305) - you deserved it (25875)

On 03/11/2013 at 7:33am - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27719) - you deserved it (46071)

On 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42310) - you deserved it (11205)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40956) - you deserved it (3254)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML


I agree, your life sucks (61517) - you deserved it (3794)

On 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by thoughtidseenitall (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30835) - you deserved it (4729)

On 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML


I agree, your life sucks (37365) - you deserved it (3622)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (41019) - you deserved it (5059)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by Mary - Czech Republic

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33680) - you deserved it (9214)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29046) - you deserved it (5609)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33108) - you deserved it (14437)

On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40965) - you deserved it (4301)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:07am - animals - by catdog - United States (California)

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43294) - you deserved it (4293)

On 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML


I agree, your life sucks (86094) - you deserved it (26559)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, my co-worker had a bad cold that stuffed up his ears and nose. This wouldn't have been a problem, except that he believed his farts were silent and scentless. They were so vile, they could have killed a horse. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35404) - you deserved it (3003)

On 12/22/2012 at 3:06am - work - by Iknoweverything (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Scarlatine's illustrated FML

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