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About fightingkittens : Does anyone else find it mildly disturbing that they not only publish the date but the day of your birth?
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
One ring to rule them all
You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.
Today, due to an unforeseen pipe-related incident, I had to shave my legs in my backyard fish pond, while a plumber assessed the damage to my war-zone of a bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2303) - you deserved it (445)
On 05/25/2012 at 3:59pm - misc - by KieRendan (woman) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3453) - you deserved it (5934)
On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1902) - you deserved it (7385)
On 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm - misc - by smh (man) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3096) - you deserved it (5276)
On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, an exchange student was telling us how he once used a black light to detect semen stains on his "abstinent" ex-girlfriend's face. I called him out on the obvious lie, saying it's an old urban legend. He wigged out, screamed that I'm a "bastarding shite-wank" and ran out of class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4071) - you deserved it (961)
On 05/04/2012 at 5:53pm - intimacy - by Garry (man) - United States
Today, I walked into a public restroom to find that they had set up a free health clinic for the homeless; by that I mean that I found one bum inspecting and cleaning the infected, bloody genitals of another bum. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5419) - you deserved it (603)
On 04/26/2012 at 8:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, I yet again heard a friend say "YOLO" as if it's a word. It was so annoying that I had to restrain myself from punching him in the face and offering him the chance to suck on one of my turds, since apparently "YOLO." FML
I agree, your life sucks (4929) - you deserved it (1246)
On 04/24/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13788) - you deserved it (2511)
On 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm - health - by JurassicHole (man) - United States
Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21432) - you deserved it (1699)
On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5211) - you deserved it (904)
On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States
Today, I was stabbed in the chest. Not with a knife though, the under-wire from my bra escaped and stabbed me in the boob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6658) - you deserved it (800)
On 03/21/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by J.O.S (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was out with my dog, who loves to bury things. He had recently torn apart his toy and buried it in the sand. I saw a piece of it sticking out of the ground, so I picked it up. It turns out that I was not holding his toy, but rather a dead bat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5692) - you deserved it (574)
On 03/21/2012 at 12:03pm - animals - by GabisayzRAWR - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16537) - you deserved it (1034)
On 03/19/2012 at 9:03pm - animals - by CA19oo - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17780) - you deserved it (4509)
On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my doctor booked me in for an STD test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said: "Gonna be honest, Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17360) - you deserved it (3179)
On 03/15/2012 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by 0stvn0 (man) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
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