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ffmmllyaya

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  • Number of visits : 1555
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ffmmllyaya's favorite FMLs

Today, I re-dislocated my arm trying to get it out of the cast it was in because I didn't want to pay the $50 dollar fee to get it taken off. FML

#4660097
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8690) - you deserved it (86695)

On 08/19/2009 at 5:02pm - health - by flaps (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

#4505034
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35055) - you deserved it (78839)

On 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm - kids - by bubbalicious (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my mom about how my friend is going to China for a year instead of college. My mom suggested that I could do the same. When I told her that a trip to China is probably more expensive than my college tuition, my mom replied, "Not for a one way ticket". FML

#4454040
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39584) - you deserved it (6031)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by unwanted - Canada

Today, I had a big party that left my house really messy. I spent hours cleaning the house until it was spotless. When my parents got home, my dad said "Did you have fun at the party?" and I said, "How'd you know?" and he replied "You hate cleaning and the house was filthy when we left". FML

#3777145
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11062) - you deserved it (48851)

On 07/15/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by far23 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to my friend's house for the first time. As I was pulling up, I called him and asked him if I could use his bathroom. He told me to just go in the back and use it, so i did. As i'm sitting on the toilet, someone knocks on the door and asks me who I am. It wasn't my friend's house. FML

#3645311
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52225) - you deserved it (11002)

On 07/10/2009 at 5:22pm - misc - by whitewater_al (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was at the cafeteria of my school with my boyfriend and he dumped me. I was kinda expecting it. What I wasn't expecting was that he'd start running in front of everyone, screaming "FREEEEEEEEEDOM!" at the top of his lungs and that he'd kiss the first girl he saw. FML

#2822887
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87752) - you deserved it (9961)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:39am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her bluetooth headset. FML

#2147248
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19637) - you deserved it (70116)

On 05/21/2009 at 3:16pm - work - by unemployed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
437 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33217) - you deserved it (144801)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I heard my mom ask "Are you okay?" I opened my mouth to tell her about how I've been feeling suicidal lately. At that second, I realized she was talking to my cat. FML

#1399688
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60544) - you deserved it (6149)

On 04/27/2009 at 5:50pm - animals - by Tragic (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my family and I drove to a mall an hour away. We split up, and I went into a store by myself. A little later, I get a call from my brother asking me where I am. They had already left to go home and didn't notice me missing from the car. They were already halfway home. FML

#1368223
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55479) - you deserved it (2678)

On 04/26/2009 at 7:44pm - misc - by chippuh (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after driving a few hours late at night I decided to entertain the car tailgating me by not letting him pass. After doing this for 3miles, reaching 93MPH, I decided to let the car pass me. When I switched lanes, the car tailgating me light up in red and blue. It was a cop. FML

#1363713
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9939) - you deserved it (88228)

On 04/26/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, at the rehearsal for my wedding, my mother told my bride's mother to fuck off. FML

#1072377
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74411) - you deserved it (3653)

On 04/17/2009 at 11:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was at the orthodontist. As the lady was clipping my brackets, she missed and clipped my gums instead. She looked at me and said, "Oh sorry, you're bleeding really badly. See, I got these fake nails put on and I guess I'm just not used to them. Let me try again." She missed. FML

#883158
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75878) - you deserved it (2728)

On 04/09/2009 at 8:33am - misc - by BracesSuck (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, it was really windy and rainy causing me to trip and knock into a little kid. While still gathering myself, I apologized and patted the kid on its' head. Then I see people around me starting to laugh. I turn and look at the kid, and discover I've been interacting with a trash can. FML

#832092
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26105) - you deserved it (47755)

On 04/06/2009 at 7:47am - kids - by trashcanned (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had a meeting with my super-hot TA. When I got to her office, she complimented me for being early, to which I thoughtfully replied "oh I usually come early." She laughed. FML

#379796
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53187) - you deserved it (31924)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:40pm - misc - by SmoothTalker (man) - United States (Tennessee)



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