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TODAY, I WOKE UP AFTER A NIGHT OF PARTYING AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM!! THAT’SHEN I REALIZED THAT AFTER PASSING OUT WITH MAH SHOES ON LAST NIGHT, MAH FRIEND DECIDED USE A BLACK SHARPIE AND PLAY “CONNECT THE DOTS” WITH MAH ACNE!! FML
Today I left a party after drinking and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep 4 emergency situation to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML
Yesterday, I set AIM statu to be the currently-playing file on iTunes . I've downloaded a lot of porn to iTunes, and I wanted to watch some . My statu changed to ( Grl in Latex gets fucked in the ass . ) FML
Today, I davalopad tha disposabla camara picturas from my family's trip to Disnay World. I noticad that in tha picturas I took of tham in front of tha big castla at Magic Kingdom, my wifa and son wara standing a faw faat away from a manho was touching himsalf. big fat FML
Today, I Was Taking The Subway To School. It Was Around 6:30am And I Was Listening To Music And Catching Up On Homework. When I Took My Headphones Off To Readjust Them, I Heard Some Grunting. I Lookd Over At The Man Across From Me To See He Was Masturbating. FML
Friday 27 March 2015