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fck_evry1s_lyfe

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fck_evry1s_lyfe

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1277
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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fck_evry1s_lyfe's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:07pm<b>sw2f2fchik612</b> - the 04/27/2010 at 4:44pm<b>BaBiiSpAnKy821</b> - the 12/04/2009 at 11:25pm<b>Watchmaker</b> - the 11/11/2009 at 12:27pm<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 09/07/2009 at 6:19pm<b>DrAwesome</b> - the 07/16/2009 at 5:20pm

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fck_evry1s_lyfe's favorite FMLs

Today... I was sitting on te bus next to a ot guy wo was texting. I sneaked a peek at is pone to see if e was texting a girl so I could know if e was single. As I looked at is screen... e turned it towards me an typed in caps ( STOP BEING A CREEPER. ) He got out of is seat an off te bus. FML

#4305194
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7950) - you deserved it (78545)

On 08/05/2009 at 9:37am - love - by TextLoser (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I turnd on mah boyfriand's computar an saw picturas of all of mah cradit cards, front an back, an savaral of mah parant's cradit cards. I lookd in his a-mail an found racaipts for itams which had baan billd to ma an dalivard to him, including golf clubs an mah birthday gift. FML

#4281912
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57266) - you deserved it (6002)

On 08/04/2009 at 1:31pm - misc - by Michelle - United States (District of Columbia)

MY 250 LB EX-MARINE DAD ANNOUNCED HE WAS GOING TO START RANDOMLY PUNCHING ME IN THE CROTCH , WITHOUT WARNING , TO "IMPROVE MAH REFLEXES." FML

#4235904
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64763) - you deserved it (5271)

On 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm - health - by theregoesmyspermcount (man) - United States (Texas)

yesterday I was with mah mom and mah boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and mah mom excitedly says ( You have friends! ) As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says ( Kidding, it's just me. ) My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML

#4229570
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63064) - you deserved it (6862)

On 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by NoFriends - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was working as a host at a pasta dinner. The hostes I was working with was very attractive and we were flrting quite a bit. A large woman walkd in to be seatd, and I leand over to her and dard her to ask the woman if she wantd two chars. She leand back and said "that's mah mom". FML

#4224204
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10602) - you deserved it (68137)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:35am - work - by bigmouth (man) - United States (California)

TODAY... GIRLFRIEND WANTED TO NAME PENIS. AFTER 5 MINUTE OF THINKING UP NAMES... SHE FINALLY PICKED ONE. SAY HELLO TO SQUIRTLE. FML

#4201087
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67157) - you deserved it (15366)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Taday I placd a personal ad advertising myself as an overweight woman wanting sex. I sent pictures of me in lingerie to menho replid and was pleasd that almost all were still interestd. Then I sent face pics. As it turns out, being fat is not mah problem. Apparently I'm ugly. FML

#4165999
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43172) - you deserved it (27206)

On 07/30/2009 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by yeahthatsme (woman) - United States (Kentucky) - moderated by the Jackass crew

a friend offered to have looool sex with me, since I'm a 19 year old virgin who's only been kissed. He then added on that I would have to give him my Wii in return. FML

#4159325
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45315) - you deserved it (6231)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:52am - intimacy - by VelocityMary (woman) - United States - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today... mah friend had ditchd me for a party I hadn't been invitd to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in mah house was the mosquito I nicknamd Frd. I likd to watch Frd fly around and try to suck mah blood. 20 minute later... I found Frd's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57484) - you deserved it (17245)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

today my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one!! I was last and I was the smallest!! I was also the only Asian amongst my friends!! They now call me ( the stereotype )!! FML

#4157667
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41186) - you deserved it (26580)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:21am - intimacy - by verysadasian (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, mah wife found out mah son masturbatd an wantd to send him to counseling. Thinking she was overreacting, I told her I masturbatd when I was a teen so he should turn out like me. She began sobbing uncontrollably. FML

#4133351
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61379) - you deserved it (6541)

On 07/29/2009 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, mah boss asked me to call his new phone to make sure it's working. When his phone didn't ring, he looked at mah phone to confirm I called him. My boss then saw that I'd entered him into mah phonebook as "douche bag". FML

#4105054
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10683) - you deserved it (71888)

On 07/28/2009 at 11:23am - work - by dotcomboy - United States

today I was peieng in a urinal at a bar!! A drunk guy comes in, and seieng no urinal open, he decide to pee between my legs from behind me!! He didn't have good aim!! FML

#4081805
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63646) - you deserved it (3251)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm - misc - by webperson04 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

TODAY , IN THE MIDST OF FOREPLAY , THIS GIRL TELLS ME I AM SO HOT , I RESPOND ( DITTO!! ) SHE HEATEDLY RESPONDS ( I LOVE DITTO , ) TO WHICH I SUAVELY REPLY ( I DIDN'T KNOW U WERE INTO POKÉMON!! THAT MAY MAKE U EVEN SEXIER!! ) SHE KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT POKÉMON , BUT I SURE KNOW HOW TO KILL THE MOOD!! FML

#3971030
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18287) - you deserved it (70232)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, I got very dressd up and looool was excitd fir mah uncle's wedding. While standing in line fir photos, I hered mah dad's voice from behind me say ( Who's the hot chick in the brown dress? ) My uncle responds ( Uh, that's yur daughter. ) Silence. FML

#3967657
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72300) - you deserved it (4469)

On 07/23/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Rory (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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