Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

fatman1970

Offline (the 05/06/2014 at 12:06pm) | Search for a member

fatman1970

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 January 1970 (44 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2828
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About fatman1970 : Balding, overweight and ugly!

fatman1970's page activity

Visits<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:57pm<b>singer0421</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:12am<b>SiRiSpartan</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 11:38pm<b>swick25</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 10:20pm<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 10:50pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 5:04pm<b>SamanthaaNicolee</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 5:21pm<b>beaglegal</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 5:00pm<b>Trekos</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 10:41am<b>NightSkyRider</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 4:54pm<b>laurenzie</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 11:34pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:59pm<b>xTrepidation</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 8:20pm<b>tegraturbo2000</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 1:20pm<b>elevensysix</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 10:58am<b>boobsarefun</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 4:41pm<b>shadowolf1120</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 11:55pm<b>miwako</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 10:18am

fatman1970's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of fatman1970's badges

fatman1970's favorite FMLs

Today, I was waiting in a line, texting on my phone. I hear what sounded like a sneeze and said, "Bless you" to the man in front of me. He gave me a dirty look as I began to smell something awful. It wasn't a sneeze. FML

#21211315
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36943) - you deserved it (401)

On 07/16/2014 at 10:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54055) - you deserved it (4793) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I broke my nose trying to pop a zit. FML

#21168348
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43438) - you deserved it (19338)

On 06/09/2014 at 3:36pm - health - by blanknameisblank (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, out of habit from twelve years of karate classes, I bowed to my teacher as I exited my classroom. My chemistry classroom. FML

#21156297
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39774) - you deserved it (6098)

On 05/29/2014 at 7:32pm - work - by mathesonn - United States (New York)

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

#21151390
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43555) - you deserved it (7893)

On 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm - intimacy - by whoops (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48982) - you deserved it (3926)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40259) - you deserved it (6139)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, my clingy girlfriend refused to leave me alone long enough for me to read an article about dealing with clingy girlfriends. FML

#21095315
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40668) - you deserved it (5852)

On 03/24/2014 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my roommate pranked me by putting blue food coloring in the shower head. I have class in 20 minutes and look like a smurf. FML

#21076785
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37720) - you deserved it (3246)

On 03/03/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I'm severely sunburned and can barely walk properly. My boyfriend keeps telling his friends that it's because of "how hard he gave it to me last night". FML

#20936372
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47451) - you deserved it (7597)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:51am - intimacy - by snowwhite (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

#20833377
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49913) - you deserved it (2749)

On 08/12/2013 at 4:17am - animals - by The Corner Of Death (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I were fooling around, and things got heated. In the heat of things, I told him to tear my panties off. He took it literally and yanked at them with all his might. It's been two hours and I still can't walk straight. FML

#20827713
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46658) - you deserved it (17452)

On 08/08/2013 at 6:15pm - intimacy - by fuck my arse (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73539) - you deserved it (3528)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my wife made me moist cat food burgers as a prank. I didnt have the heart to tell her that they tasted better than the ones she usually makes. FML

#20742017
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44174) - you deserved it (3580)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:05am - misc - by kittybad - United States



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: