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Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34520) - you totally deserved it (7531)
On 04/28/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was hanging out at my school with some friends when my mom came to pick me up. A girl I knew wanted a hug before I left. I turned around to hug her and a clip on my backpack got stuck on her tank top. I tuned away the clip pulled the shirt ripping it and exposing her naked chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47657) - you totally deserved it (4733)
On 04/26/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Mikey (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I told my mom that I was taking antidepressants because I hate myself. She said "That's not surprising. You hate everybody. And, you're kind of a bitch." FML
I agree, your life sucks (50653) - you totally deserved it (13017)
On 04/20/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I thought it would be funny to fart in my roommates mouth while he was asleep. I walked over to him and pulled my pyjamas down and let loose. To my surprise it was a very wet one and I accidently took a dump on his face, he woke up and beat me until I was bleeding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16591) - you totally deserved it (249329)
On 04/18/2009 at 1:09am - health - by dumptaker (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I took the bus home. A bum sat next to me. Reeking with alcohol and sweat, he pulls out a pair of nail clippers and proceeds to clip his grimy finger nails. With every clip, the nails would fly up and hit me. As I was about to ask him to stop, a nail flies into my mouth. I swallowed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (73635) - you totally deserved it (4420)
On 04/14/2009 at 8:19pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
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