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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for a familiar reason; I apparently have night terrors that make me "Impossible to sleep in the same room with." I don't ever remember these dreams. Every other girlfriend I've had has ended up breaking things off with me for the same reason. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26835) - you deserved it (2866)
On 12/09/2011 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada
Today, my husband asked me, "Why do you love me?" I spent the next five minutes spilling my heart and soul out to him. After I'd asked the same question, he looked me straight in the eye and said, "I don't." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42489) - you deserved it (2834)
On 11/28/2011 at 7:51am - love - by nirvana_mama157 - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22756) - you deserved it (6679)
Today, I was looking through some old family pictures for a scrapbook I'm making. I found images of my dad passed out in his underwear, my great-grandpa having a drunken bath, and an unidentified moustachioed man sitting on the toilet, giving the photographer the finger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15766) - you deserved it (1863)
On 11/27/2011 at 11:02pm - misc - by Meowingtons500 - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30599) - you deserved it (7016)
On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I lost a huge bet with my friends. I had to either post a sexual message on my mom's Facebook wall confessing my "love" for her, or be ratted out for cheating on a school test earlier in the year. Now I'm considered a freak by half my school, and am indefinitely grounded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5630) - you deserved it (27148)
On 11/27/2011 at 6:16pm - misc - by honor sucks (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my dad had his "sixteen years overdue" vasectomy. I'm fifteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20800) - you deserved it (1730)
On 11/27/2011 at 4:41pm - misc - by davidh5012 (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was jogging when a woman ran out of her house and handed me an invitation for a party. What was the invitation for? A weight loss treatment party. Guess the jogging isn't working. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17195) - you deserved it (1822)
On 11/27/2011 at 12:30am - health - by jogger (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was jogging when a woman ran out of her house and handed me an invitation for a party. What was the invitation for? A weight loss treatment party. Guess the jogging isn't working. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17195) - you deserved it (1822)
On 11/27/2011 at 12:30am - health - by jogger (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at the mall and started singing along to the playing of "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas." A kid glanced at me and said to her mom, "She IS a hippopotamus." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24831) - you deserved it (7203)
On 11/26/2011 at 6:13pm - misc - by Person15 - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56585) - you deserved it (2319)
On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56585) - you deserved it (2319)
On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)
Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21269) - you deserved it (6508)
On 11/26/2011 at 3:50pm - love - by Rich (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, it's the second week into my new neighbors' routine. He works nights, she works days. He likes to blast out Slayer and Napalm Death all day, she likes to drunkenly sing out of tune to Adele all night. I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21531) - you deserved it (1705)
On 11/26/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Help - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out my boyfriend is cheating on me with a woman twice my age. I'm 32. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40990) - you deserved it (2644)
On 11/26/2011 at 12:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Monday 20 May 2013
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