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faithxoxox

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faithxoxox
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1174
  • Number of comments : 122
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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faithxoxox's favorite FMLs

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a diet coke?" FML

#19895683
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33453) - you deserved it (8601)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, after backpacking acrossing Europe for a month, I picked up my dog from the doghouse. No one will listen to me or acknowledge the fact that he's now missing two toes. FML

#19895009
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30698) - you deserved it (2157)

On 07/05/2012 at 12:30pm - animals - by tagteam - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, what started as my mom calling my grandma for a recipe turned into them discussing the philosophical reason behind my baking. I apparently picked up baking because I'm depressed over unemployment. And here I thought I just liked the smell of baked goods. FML

#19892549
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15045) - you deserved it (1365)

On 07/04/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by Shortcake (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking past a homeless guy while smoking; he asked if he could have a cigarette. So I gave him one and said without thinking, "Sorry, it’s a menthol, but beggars can't be choosers." FML

#19878308
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7646) - you deserved it (21779)

On 07/01/2012 at 10:51pm - misc - by Misky (man) -

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25824) - you deserved it (3485)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend finally met my brother. He arrested him for drunk driving. FML

#19860817
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22002) - you deserved it (2906)

On 06/28/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by daniella101 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML

#19823545
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17577) - you deserved it (920)

On 06/21/2012 at 10:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33939) - you deserved it (5624)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, I was shopping with a friend. We snuck into the same fitting room so we could give our opinions on each other's clothes. The suspicious saleswoman knocked on the door and asked how many people were in our room. I quickly answered, "It's OK. She's just watching." FML

#19669022
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14632) - you deserved it (6440)

On 05/23/2012 at 6:50pm - misc - by Shopper (woman) - United States

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

#19486028
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35879) - you deserved it (3392)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States

Today, I was in the car with my daughter, when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML

#19478782
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4489) - you deserved it (24919)

On 04/16/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by DJ Clitter (man) - United States

Today, my parents invited my Muslim boyfriend over for dinner for the first time. My mother made sure that everything including the salad had pork in it. FML

#19465353
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29323) - you deserved it (6191)

On 04/14/2012 at 7:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He gave me a cupcake. FML

#19235270
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19458) - you deserved it (3125)

On 03/07/2012 at 8:08pm - work - by Janitor (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant for our anniversary. Mid-way through the meal, a guy at the table across left for the restroom. My girlfriend reached over and swiped the guy's wallet from the table. My gonads went AWOL, and I couldn't even bring myself to call her out on it. FML

#19222204
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7669) - you deserved it (22733)

On 03/05/2012 at 5:55pm - misc - by mark (man) - United Kingdom (London)



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