Hi. My name is Stacey.
I tend to be told by others that I'm quite intelligent and I hope to be a lawyer.
Now that FML has messages, I must say that there is no excuse that you shouldn't message me. So.. leave one(:
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42299) - you totally deserved it (10226)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Today, I was in the gas station and I saw this creepy lady staring at me and smiling. She just didn't stop. I even gave an awkward wave to let her know that I saw her staring at me. Finally I decided to confront the woman, turns out the overly happy woman was a cardboard cut out FML
I agree, your life sucks (7192) - you totally deserved it (38555)
On 07/15/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, a car floated slowly into my lane from the left with no signal. She gazed at the right turn like it was going to kiss her. "What the FUCK, lady?" I shouted, slamming on my brakes. Two seconds later I hear a tiny voice in my back seat, "What fut, YADY?!" My 22 month old son's first full sentence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13098) - you totally deserved it (40560)
On 06/22/2009 at 1:30am - kids - by ObeyTheFist (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was cleaning my father's study room and wondering why I did not receive my acceptance/rejection letter from a college I really wanted. I found the acceptance letter, on his desk, also approving of a full scholarship. The deadline to confirm was a month ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (81033) - you totally deserved it (2082)
Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking: "What can I get for you cuntie?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41851) - you totally deserved it (10704)
On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (202280) - you totally deserved it (32341)
On 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was sitting in class and I fell asleep during the lesson. I was wearing sweatpants and had an erection. My teacher came up to me and grabbed my penis. She thought it was my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (386212) - you totally deserved it (67791)
On 02/27/2009 at 2:52pm - intimacy - by jgondi1 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (488864) - you totally deserved it (31195)
On 02/09/2009 at 8:55pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my girlfriend dumped me proclaiming she wanted someone more like her "Edward". I asked her who Edward was. She held up a copy her "Twilight" book. She was talking about a fictional vampire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (343962) - you totally deserved it (50781)
On 02/05/2009 at 7:06am - love - by Noname - United States (Illinois)
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