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evnflr

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 15 March 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1180
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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Visits<b>Squtchy</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 7:46pm<b>tyoung94</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 11:35pm<b>breebree893</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 3:57am<b>farhil</b> - the 12/05/2011 at 8:08pm

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evnflr's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML

#20188746
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22370) - you deserved it (2279)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I ran into my sister, who nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML

#20179890
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29230) - you deserved it (3365)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

#20176364
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18294) - you deserved it (6861)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:59am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized the number of cats I currently have is higher than the number of guys I've ever dated. FML

#20169381
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18583) - you deserved it (16218)

On 11/19/2012 at 11:15am - animals - by crazycatlady (woman) - United States

Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend came and sat on my lap. She landed directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. FML

Today, at daycare, a little girl cussed me out because I didn't have any apple juice left. When I called her parents, they sided with her and cussed me out too. My boss refused to sympathize, and reprimanded me for not making sure we still had apple juice. FML

#20148817
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22994) - you deserved it (2354)

On 11/05/2012 at 12:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29587) - you deserved it (4510)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML

#20086472
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19704) - you deserved it (5665)

On 09/24/2012 at 10:33am - kids - by smashed (man) - United States

Today, my mom turned off all internet access in our house because she thought I spent too much time on the computer. She later asked me why she couldn't get on Facebook. FML

Today, my nitwit son infected our family computer with some sort of mad bastard virus after getting fooled by the promise of some non-existent Hannah Montana nudes. FML

#20076697
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21960) - you deserved it (2615)

On 09/17/2012 at 7:25pm - kids - by StupidBerk (man) - United Kingdom

Today, feeling angry at the world, I threw a bottle, that had been clearly marked to be recycled, into a garbage can as an act of defiance. Minutes later, I guiltily retreated and spent the next few minutes with my entire arm stuck up the stinking ass of a city garbage can. FML

#20069676
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5430) - you deserved it (30816)

On 09/12/2012 at 11:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML

#20047830
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30772) - you deserved it (6048)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. To celebrate, I spent the day with her and then took her out to a really nice dinner. She is currently giving me the silent treatment because I didn't write "happy birthday" on her Facebook wall. FML

#20009566
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34387) - you deserved it (3730)

On 08/08/2012 at 1:15pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML

#20009332
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28554) - you deserved it (3083)

On 08/08/2012 at 9:53am - work - by blakeintheoffice - United States

Today, while watching the Olympics, my father found it completely necessary to make a farting sound every single time an athlete jumps or bends over. This will be a very long few weeks. FML

#19995451
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18772) - you deserved it (1942)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by joleezad5 - United States (Missouri)



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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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