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esp_superstar

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esp_superstar
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1559
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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esp_superstar's favorite FMLs

Today, these kids in my math class told me to ask this girl if I could lick her clit. I basically yelled 'what's a clit'? Everyone looked at me. I'm a senior in high school, no one has yet to explain it to me. I had to google it when i got home. FML

#254280
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33281) - you deserved it (73788)

On 03/09/2009 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by danmarino (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was driving down the road when I got to a red light. I looked over and saw a hot chick in a convertible so I spoke to my window thinking she couldn't hear me "Hey girl, I may have a tiny dick but I make up for it in speed and stamina." She looked over. I forgot about the sunroof. FML

#239452
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6165) - you deserved it (66087)

On 03/08/2009 at 12:36am - intimacy - by Smash_Mouth - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the ER for severe pain in my abdominal area. The doctor comes in after looking at the CT scan and says, "Well it's not your appendix." Thinking I'm in the clear I say, "That's Awesome", the doctor then responded with "It's probably your testicles." FML

Today, it is my twin sisters and my birthday. We both wanted a day at the spa for our birthday. My sister got a gift certificate to the spa, while I got mouthwash and a $20 gift card to Target. My mom said it would cost too much to make me pretty also. FML

#208203
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (104863) - you deserved it (4853)

On 03/04/2009 at 4:48pm - misc - by Kensie (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I slipped on the ice in front of my apartment, spraining my ankle and cracking a rib. While I laid on the ground immediately after, my neighbor chewed me out for saying "shit" in front of her 4-year-old on my way down. FML

#206067
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56171) - you deserved it (2787)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:03pm - misc - by stupidneighbor (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend asked me what I enjoyed most about the weekend we'd spent together. I mention in detail a certain move he had pulled when we made love. When asked what he enjoyed most, he replies "putting my fish tank together". FML

#192617
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38008) - you deserved it (4435)

On 03/03/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by lucy (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1095013) - you deserved it (108816)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I had a performance evaluation meeting with my boss. He told me I was the best in my department, and that the productivity has never been higher before I started working here. Oh, and he said that because everything is working so well, they don't need me as much, so he's cutting my hours. FML

#142534
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51010) - you deserved it (2118)

On 02/26/2009 at 12:05pm - work - by lolgarbl (man) - United States (California)

Today, I called the florist and ordered a flower arrangement for my grandma, who I was told was sick. I said I didn't know what to get her, so just to send her something nice. I got a call from my mom calling me an inconsiderate bastard. They sent my grandma forget-me-nots. She has Alzheimers. FML

#117948
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38743) - you deserved it (5938)

On 02/23/2009 at 9:22pm - misc - by Originality18 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to get my blood drawn for the first time. After I explained to the nurse how nervous I was, she replied, "Oh honey, don't worry! This is my first time too!" FML

#91995
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43558) - you deserved it (2210)

On 02/20/2009 at 9:37pm - health - by trackgurl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179
717 comments

I agree, your life sucks (735998) - you deserved it (73973)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was feeling really upset and called my boyfriend. He said "Can you feel upset a little later? I'm watching a movie." FML

#69146
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37460) - you deserved it (5139)

On 02/18/2009 at 3:35pm - love - by noname (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was complaining to my mom about how my sister looked like a barbie doll next to me. I was saying how she was so tan and her hair looked awesome next to mine. She paused for a while and then said "Well you're pretty on the inside." FML

#55287
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29517) - you deserved it (7356)

On 02/16/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by Dasani (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a fastfood restaurant to pick up food for my work party. I ordered 250 chicken fingers, 15 orders of fries, and 2 gallons of tea, and the guy behind the counter asked, "Is this for here or to go?" FML

Today, my mom and I were looking at pictures from the beach. She goes, "That is a REALLY ugly picture of Michelle" (my cousin). The picture was of me. FML

#25739
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30206) - you deserved it (2023)

On 02/11/2009 at 2:57pm - misc - by bm (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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