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erynys

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erynys
  • Town/Country : Gainesville, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 November 1982 (31 years)
  • Number of visits : 1792
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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erynys's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my younger sister to see Santa for a photo. Santa insisted that I was in the photo too. I wasn't sure why he made such a big deal about it until he groped me while the photo was being taken. FML

Today, for my 18th birthday my mum gave me a black lace thong. I'm a guy. FML

#20992659
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36462) - you deserved it (3202)

On 12/14/2013 at 7:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, a kid from my school called me, saying he's going on vacation to Japan soon and that since I was born there, I could teach him the language. His exact words at the start of the call were: "Hey man, you speak Asian, right?" I have to be around this shithead 5 days a week. FML

#20992530
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41874) - you deserved it (3439)

On 12/14/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by bnc (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

#20992325
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42935) - you deserved it (7376)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my cousin started sending sarcastic love messages to me. I replied, with even cheesier lines. Then she rang me saying she was so glad I felt the same way. Turns out she wasn't being sarcastic. FML

#20991120
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46336) - you deserved it (7570)

On 12/13/2013 at 10:10am - love - by wth? - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today, I have such an irrational fear of the noise my smoke detector makes when it goes off, that dying in my sleep from smoke inhalation or carbon monoxide poisoning sounds absolutely peachy by comparison. FML

#20990951
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29626) - you deserved it (5109)

On 12/13/2013 at 2:55am - health - by TheLadyOpal (woman) - United States

Today, I got back the essay I wrote about how my country's education system is fucked. At one point, I made a spelling mistake. My teacher wrote a note about it, basically calling me illiterate and telling me to pay attention in school instead of whining about it. She misspelled "school". FML

#20990145
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39195) - you deserved it (3472)

On 12/12/2013 at 1:00pm - misc - by lrn2spel, teach (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML

#20986172
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49250) - you deserved it (2945)

On 12/09/2013 at 10:10am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML

#20985907
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44028) - you deserved it (2852)

On 12/09/2013 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was accused of shoplifting because my jacket looked "too chunky". I wasn't stealing, I'm just fat. FML

#20985487
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42402) - you deserved it (5766)

On 12/08/2013 at 8:16pm - health - by goingtothegym (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49643) - you deserved it (2360)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that when your mom threatens to embarrass you by singing in public, the wrong response is, "Yeah? I dare you." FML

Today, the girl of my dreams said yes when I asked her out. Our conversation afterward consisted of her telling me "no one can know" and saying she doesn't want to do things normal couples do. I'm basically in the deepest level of the "friendzone": the friendzoned boyfriend. FML

#20983541
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48697) - you deserved it (4791)

On 12/07/2013 at 1:56am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a customer threatened to come back later and shoot the whole place up. Why? I didn't give him a discount on his beer. My boss's reaction when I called the police: "Why didn't you give him the discount?!" Last week he bitched me out for letting a girl off for being a few cents short on hers. FML

#20983086
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38265) - you deserved it (2611)

On 12/06/2013 at 6:37pm - work - by eat my fucking ass, boss (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

#20982965
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45706) - you deserved it (3916)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)



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