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erynys

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erynys
  • Town/Country : Gainesville, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 November 1982 (31 years)
  • Number of visits : 1747
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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erynys's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the mouth while eating a Go-Gurt. I was eating it because I'd just had my wisdom teeth removed. FML

#20886516
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38165) - you deserved it (4414)

On 09/18/2013 at 12:55pm - health - by GogurtBadass - United States (Washington)

Today, I found a pamphlet for alcohol counseling on my front door today. I think it was from the guys who pick up my recycling. FML

#20886188
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32985) - you deserved it (9591)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:19am - health - by I get the hint -

Today, after getting back from a year-long world trip, I nearly fell on my knees and cried when I saw boxes of Twinkies at my local gas station. Finding out they were back was the highlight of the year. FML

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

#20883807
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41970) - you deserved it (7408)

On 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by meganmagee (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my son asked me if slavery was ever abolished. He's 19. FML

#20883742
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40016) - you deserved it (6472)

On 09/16/2013 at 1:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50142) - you deserved it (25048)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, I asked a friend to hang out. I'm so used to people saying no, that when she said yes I burst into tears and had a panic attack. FML

#20880509
116 comments

Today, I got fired from my volunteer job. FML

#20879963
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37691) - you deserved it (9488)

On 09/13/2013 at 6:24pm - work - by Volunteer (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up and saw that my alarm clock had fallen on the floor. It read 9:05 am. I panicked because I was late for work. As I frantically got ready, I went to pick my alarm clock up to place it back on my nightstand when I realized it was upside down. The actual time was 5:06. FML

#20879453
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36731) - you deserved it (6055)

On 09/13/2013 at 9:24am - misc - by NoorFML (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend is upset with me for not wanting to sext. I can't sext with her because she adds 'lol' to everything which turns me off. FML

#20879249
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44880) - you deserved it (4919)

On 09/13/2013 at 2:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML

#20879220
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42569) - you deserved it (4677)

On 09/13/2013 at 1:55am - work - by ellen77 - United States (California)

Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called me a "two-timing whore", dumped his coffee on me and walked out in tears. I'm 14 and I have no idea who he was. FML

#20878614
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54014) - you deserved it (3294)

On 09/12/2013 at 6:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was standing in line at the grocery store waiting for my husband. After a while, I feel him kissing my neck, so I turn to tell him that it's not appropriate in public. It wasn't my husband. FML

#20878205
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54816) - you deserved it (3869)

On 09/12/2013 at 10:44am - love - by whyme (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I officially became a divorced marriage counselor. FML

#20877295
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42836) - you deserved it (6992)

On 09/11/2013 at 5:35pm - work - by natattack - United States (Texas)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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