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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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ericnx

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ericnx
  • Town/Country : Tacoma, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 4 November 1997 (14 years)
  • Number of visits : 359
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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ericnx's FML badges

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ericnx's favorite FMLs

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043 (441)

I agree, your life sucks (20462) - you deserved it (59905)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was invited into a group chat on Skype. Everyone ignored everything I said, so I got pissed and started yelling at them. Then I realised my microphone wasn't plugged in right. FML

#17055624 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (6573) - you deserved it (36060)

On 07/10/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by Canuckster (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874 (47)

I agree, your life sucks (49715) - you deserved it (9499)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

#15532710 (597)

I agree, your life sucks (44517) - you deserved it (19915)

On 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by dickface - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

#15334821 (315)

I agree, your life sucks (11831) - you deserved it (34532)

On 03/16/2011 at 9:01am - work - by Almostfunny (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

#15045692 (277)

I agree, your life sucks (7188) - you deserved it (53884)

On 02/19/2011 at 9:03pm - misc - by breakinphones - United States (Arizona)

Today, I thought it would be fun to drive into a stack of some empty cardboard boxes on my street. They weren't empty. FML

#14942524 (90)

I agree, your life sucks (4515) - you deserved it (34887)

On 02/11/2011 at 11:06pm - money - by 2dumb2drive - United States

Today, I toured an art museum. Our tour guide had an obvious lisp, so I tried my best not to laugh. When she asked me a question about a sculpture, I accidentally responded "Yeth ma'am". She ended the tour right there. FML

#14910524 (283)

I agree, your life sucks (5515) - you deserved it (43298)

On 02/09/2011 at 3:56pm - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while waiting for a job interview, a woman sat down next to me and asked if I was here for the job too. Thinking she was also an applicant, I tried to demoralise her, and said the job was going to be a complete joke. With that, she stood up and said, "Do you still want to go into my office?" She was the interviewer. FML

#14826763 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (5072) - you deserved it (48234)

On 02/03/2011 at 1:53pm - work - by parker1993 (man) - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML

#14199411 (91)

I agree, your life sucks (10213) - you deserved it (18819)

On 12/14/2010 at 4:26am - health - by shit (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was Rizzo in a production of Grease. I sang a line about needing a ring. I've been able to put up my left ring finger for every rehearsal, but today I put up the one next it. I flipped off the audience. FML

#14136007 (58)

I agree, your life sucks (7487) - you deserved it (12744)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

#14106944 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (9313) - you deserved it (15055)

On 12/06/2010 at 12:03pm - misc - by bribreeeeeezyfreshhh (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I downloaded porn and saved it on my desktop. After watching it, I couldn't delete it, and now it is stuck on the desktop. It is a shared computer. FML

#12752465 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (5835) - you deserved it (43297)

On 08/26/2010 at 6:09am - intimacy - by fmylife (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I thought it would be funny to moon people out of my friend's car window. I rolled down the window and mooned a random couple. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I had to get out of the car and pick up my phone and wallet, which were in my back pocket. FML

#12483686 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (2978) - you deserved it (33005)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:05pm - misc - by fullmoonfml (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I learned that if you stare at your cat and her eyes suddenly get really big, it means she's going to maul your face. FML

#6355609 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (10670) - you deserved it (19346)

On 11/18/2009 at 4:01pm - animals - by nycplywood (man) - United States (Minnesota)