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eri_gian

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eri_gian

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  • Number of visits : 402
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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eri_gian's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

#21241178
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32196) - you deserved it (6355)

On 08/19/2014 at 7:37pm - love - by lent - United States (Idaho)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35729) - you deserved it (21663)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46256) - you deserved it (18200)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

#21232320
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32725) - you deserved it (11093)

On 08/08/2014 at 3:40am - love - by alisaav (woman) - Thailand

Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her". The conversation ended with me getting hung up on because I "don't have a heart". FML

#21232277
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42852) - you deserved it (3824)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:05am - intimacy - by pocketrocket90 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had to give a video presentation. My video was on animal abuse, but I somehow played a video of myself singing Britney Spears in my room. FML

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42570) - you deserved it (6969)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42308) - you deserved it (4351)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML

#21222062
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51665) - you deserved it (5970)

On 07/27/2014 at 1:12pm - love - by fingwhore (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46164) - you deserved it (6217)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I let my sister hold my newborn daughter for the first time. I heard her mutter under her breath, "I could kill you so easily..." FML

Today, one of the special needs teens I work with confessed his love for me. It was cute until he put his erection on my leg and attempted to hump me. FML

Today, I put a picture of my cat on Facebook. A stranger sent me a message saying how "attractive" she was and that her eyes are "very seductive". So, basically, someone is trying to hit on my cat. FML

#20938804
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40047) - you deserved it (4449)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:03am - animals - by meow (woman) - United States

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48705) - you deserved it (6366)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)



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