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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML
I agree, your life sucks (34381) - you deserved it (2169)
On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41298) - you deserved it (7230)
On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42571) - you deserved it (10122)
On 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by SecondBest,IGuess (woman) - United States
Today, I wanted revenge on my college's drinks machine. For the past two days, it forgot to release a cup before pouring my coffee. This time, I had planned ahead; I put my money in, entered the code, and quickly inserted my own cup. It gave me hot water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38810) - you deserved it (4460) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24783) - you deserved it (54531)
On 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia
Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML
I agree, your life sucks (43691) - you deserved it (5665)
On 04/28/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by gibbette (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)
Today, I was driving and a cute guy was staring at me. Flattered, I smiled at him, but he didn't even react. I realized he wasn't admiring me he was admiring my truck. This is the 5th time this week. My truck gets more game than I do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40667) - you deserved it (6318)
On 04/26/2013 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51672) - you deserved it (10769)
On 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm - misc - by Skyler - United States
Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65518) - you deserved it (8075)
On 04/23/2013 at 2:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that Yale had actually accepted me seventeen years ago. My mother apparently burned my acceptance package and letters because she didn't want me to upstage her UChicago degree. FML
I agree, your life sucks (86185) - you deserved it (3208)
On 04/15/2013 at 3:37am - misc - by OPhere (man) - United States (California)
Today, when I was talking to my younger brother, he suddenly said "Oh, I was supposed to tell you that there's this girl who has a huge crush on you!" I asked who and he answered, "I totally forgot her name, that was like 2 months ago." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42105) - you deserved it (3114)
On 04/14/2013 at 3:28am - love - by MissedTheBoat (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, trying to be friendly, I said good morning to the creepy guy at work. He responded by wordlessly hugging me. I was touched, until I realized he was trying to unhook my bra. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41519) - you deserved it (6727)
On 04/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, at school, I saw the guy I like at his locker. I decided to run up from behind and surprise him. I ended up accidentally slamming his locker on his fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34955) - you deserved it (18598)
On 04/13/2013 at 11:52am - love - by saxophone911 - United States
Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54496) - you deserved it (9165)
On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44622) - you deserved it (5213)
On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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