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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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epr

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epr
  • Town/Country : Vancouver, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5049
  • Number of comments : 129
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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epr's favorite FMLs

Today, a little girl came up to me and asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?" I said, "I'm a girl of course!" She walked away, looking dazed and saying, "Whoa." FML

#13513832 (257)

I agree, your life sucks (19145) - you deserved it (3987)

On 10/19/2010 at 5:23pm - misc - by lookslikeaboyapparently (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook. I didn't know her, but she was cute, so I accepted the request. After looking at her pictures, I sent her a message saying "What's up cutie, do I know you?". She responded "Yes, I'm your cousin". FML

#13338032 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (7775) - you deserved it (35145)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:37am - love - by crucets (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (28627) - you deserved it (2429)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I started my first day at a new hospital. My first assignment? Shave an elderly man's testicles. FML

#13333152 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (27873) - you deserved it (3719)

On 10/05/2010 at 7:36pm - work - by hospital - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a spider crawling on my new roommate's cheek, so I told her to stand still so that I could flick it off. Several long seconds of flicking made me realize that it wasn't a spider at all. I had been flicking her hairy mole. FML

#13331304 (154)

I agree, your life sucks (9905) - you deserved it (20119)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:01pm - animals - by jabba (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked my mom why she decided to be a parent. She replied, in all seriousness, "Everyone else was doing it." FML

#13321505 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (17536) - you deserved it (2341)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:57pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got hit by a flying log of Salami that someone threw out of their car window, and its metal wire cut my shoulder. I got scarred by a flying hunk of pig. FML

#13320249 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (17219) - you deserved it (1611)

On 10/04/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by ifpigsflew (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my dad found the ugliest picture my mom has ever taken. I show it to her laughing. She said it looks like me. I looked again and it kind of does. FML

#13307467 (72)

I agree, your life sucks (14330) - you deserved it (4746)

On 10/03/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by krt - United States (Florida)

Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML

#13293107 (415)

I agree, your life sucks (31620) - you deserved it (7003)

On 10/02/2010 at 7:08pm - kids - by blah blah daddy - United States (California)

Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the cracks. I quickly looked away, and about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML

#13202314 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (25744) - you deserved it (1674)

On 09/25/2010 at 11:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, there were a few loud and annoying kids running around my store. My coworker and I started talking and I jokingly stated "Yeah, kids ruin everything." But before I could get out "God knows I'm not ready to be a dad," my phone rang. It was my one night stand. I'm going to be a daddy. FML

#13180863 (338)

I agree, your life sucks (9043) - you deserved it (47842)

On 09/24/2010 at 7:25am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching tv with my grandpa, and he stops flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote lands on my stomach as my mom and grandma walk in the door. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML

#13180631 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (27202) - you deserved it (2896)

On 09/24/2010 at 6:22am - misc - by Andrew - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was surfing the web for Halloween costumes, and found one labeled "Extreme Girl Nerd". With the wig, the glasses, and the buck-teeth, it looked exactly like me. FML

#13174458 (174)

I agree, your life sucks (19677) - you deserved it (4275)

On 09/23/2010 at 8:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I had some girlfriends over, while my parents were having a party at our house. My drunken dad decided to come down to the basement and show us all his third nipple. FML

#13173364 (74)

I agree, your life sucks (17818) - you deserved it (1722)

On 09/23/2010 at 7:18pm - misc - by lalala_hahaha - Sent from mobile version

Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML

#13169331 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (7036) - you deserved it (21833)

On 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)