Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

emudance

Offline (the 12/30/2013 at 11:57pm) | Search for a member

emudance

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 631
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About emudance : I am a girl. Yeeeee

emudance's page activity

Visits<b>cherrypieguy</b> - the 07/21/2010 at 6:15pm

emudance's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

emudance's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

#13697892
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56025) - you deserved it (12085)

On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I switched from a pediatrician to an adult doctor. The guy was really persistant about a few personal questions. Then he brought my parents in the room and told them that I have an abnormally small penis and what remedies he knows of to fix it. FML

#5130583
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53694) - you deserved it (3609)

On 09/08/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by dude5028 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

#5109294
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54592) - you deserved it (2926)

On 09/07/2009 at 5:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that I don't have Herpes or Genital warts. I have acne on my penis. FML

#5082348
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58256) - you deserved it (8667)

On 09/06/2009 at 2:19pm - health - by Curt (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I walked in on my parents doing it. Luckily they didn't see me so I slipped out. I looked outside, trying to take my mind of the horrors I had just witnessed, only to realize my dad's car wasn't in the driveway. FML

#5065139
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70278) - you deserved it (2902)

On 09/05/2009 at 6:11pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

#4679232
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83727) - you deserved it (7275)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:51am - love - by demk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

#4630669
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (112814) - you deserved it (8488)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML

#4570183
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60132) - you deserved it (4493)

On 08/16/2009 at 9:58am - intimacy - by bunny (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML

#4229570
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62752) - you deserved it (6848)

On 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by NoFriends - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

#3229865
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67167) - you deserved it (39391)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (139479) - you deserved it (9983)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94613) - you deserved it (19980)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: