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emorockerownage's favorite FMLs
Today, my very traditional parents told me that I should start a savings account for my marriage. I told them that I wouldn't get married until much later because I don't even have a boyfriend yet. They said, "Don't worry we already found a boy for you." FML
by Anonymous / 11/30/2009 at 1:53am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, while flying on American Airlines back from visiting family, a new born puked its breakfast all over my HP mini, knocked my orange juice ino my lap, and than coughed up another layer on top of it all. I couldn't change my pants because of we were about to experience turbulance. FML
by coloradoman / 11/30/2009 at 1:34am / United States (Colorado) / Transportation
Today, I was working at a restaurant when my manager approached me and informed me that there was people having sex in the women's washroom, and he needed me to go in and ask them to cut it out. So I did. Five minutes later, a woman walks out with her disabled son and asks to talk to my manager. FML
by Janer88 / 11/30/2009 at 12:51am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/29/2009 at 9:39pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I went hiking with my friend. We both had to pee really bad. We went to the edge of a cliff to "relieve ourselves". He peed and it came and hit me in the face, he did it on purpose. So, I decided to get him back and peed at him. The wind changed direction and hit me in the face again. FML
by Harry / 11/29/2009 at 5:53pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was lying in bed minding my own business when my mom entered the room. I was proposed to a few weeks ago by my boyfriend, and my mom came in to tell me that my boyfriend's mom was on the phone. Turns out, he stole the engagement ring from her drawer. FML
by violet / 11/29/2009 at 5:52pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
by Yoooooo0 / 11/29/2009 at 1:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/29/2009 at 11:57am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/29/2009 at 9:18am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was shopping at the grocery market and was next in line. Behind me was a woman who only had two items, so I nicely let her in front of me, as it looked like she was in a hurry. When she was all rung up, she decided to pay her $16.45 in loose change which needed to be counted out. FML
by Anonymous / 11/29/2009 at 8:49am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
by Numnum / 11/29/2009 at 8:02am / United Kingdom (Greater London) / Health
by jimmyt420 / 11/29/2009 at 4:33am / United States (California) / Love
by Nomoresandwish / 11/29/2009 at 3:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by ? / 11/29/2009 at 2:59am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/29/2009 at 2:25am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, I'm still reeling over the unexpected loss of my co-worker. I also received a notification…