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emorockerownage

Offline (the 08/28/2014 at 10:30pm) | Search for a member

emorockerownage

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 November 1985 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 46938
  • Number of comments : 127
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emorockerownage : This site owns

emorockerownage's page activity

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emorockerownage's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend caught me watching a movie on Oxygen instead of the Super Bowl. I'm a guy. FML

#4679
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7560) - you deserved it (27303)

On 02/01/2009 at 11:45am - misc - by Miko - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friend caught me watching a movie on Oxygen instead of the Super Bowl. I'm a guy. FML

#4679
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7560) - you deserved it (27303)

On 02/01/2009 at 11:45am - misc - by Miko - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friend caught me watching a movie on Oxygen instead of the Super Bowl. I'm a guy. FML

#4679
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7560) - you deserved it (27303)

On 02/01/2009 at 11:45am - misc - by Miko - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. Before, I reached over to her computer and put on "Your Body is a Wonderland". Surprisingly, I lasted through the song and didn't realize her itunes was on random. "Rape me" by Nirvana came on. I still finished. FML

#3770
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24225) - you deserved it (5703)

On 01/30/2009 at 12:27pm - love - by RollieCollieUSA - United States (Illinois)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15520) - you deserved it (67809)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

Today, I was masturbating lying on the lower bed of my brother's and my bunk beds. I finished jacking off and tried to get up to clean myself I hit my head on metal panel of the upper bed and passed out. Later woke up in my bed... found out my parents came home and saw me passed out naked holding a porn mag. FML

#2357
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14163) - you deserved it (40637)

On 01/23/2009 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by killmyself - United States (California)

Today, I went to the doctor because I broke my wrist. My mom told the nurse that I broke it while masturbating. FML

#2324
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26163) - you deserved it (3780)

On 01/23/2009 at 10:41am - misc - by Nik - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was naked in bed. I was eating vanilla yogurt and it spilt. My dad walked in and then apologized that he had walked in on me while I was masturbating. FML

#1395
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19240) - you deserved it (9034)

On 01/16/2009 at 5:10pm - misc - by stellarshaun - United States (California)

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

#513
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22542) - you deserved it (5838)

On 12/14/2008 at 8:14am - intimacy - by james - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML

#509
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10730) - you deserved it (59059)

On 12/13/2008 at 10:58pm - intimacy - by Mateo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I caught my cat humping my dog while he was asleep. I'm sleeping with the door closed from now on. FML

#497
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32085) - you deserved it (3241)

On 12/11/2008 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Black - Lebanon (Beqaa)

Today, my boyfriend told me in a very natural way that my mother is better at sex than me. FML

#452
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71303) - you deserved it (3950)

On 12/05/2008 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Mak1 - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, after having waited three long months, my shy girlfriend finally gave me a blowjob. Everything was going really well until I said, "Wow, you're really talented. Anyone would think you've been practicing your whole life." FML

#447
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8840) - you deserved it (53919)

On 12/04/2008 at 12:55am - intimacy - by noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML

#391
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44429) - you deserved it (24316)

On 11/25/2008 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by USSEYL - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)



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