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emeraldisle

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emeraldisle

79Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 November 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5674
  • Number of comments : 634
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emeraldisle : I'm awesome.

After being on this site for a while, I've come to realise that sarcasm and humour are lost on a lot of people.

emeraldisle's page activity

Visits<b>colinabi</b> - 12 hours ago<b>MethuselahTurtle</b> - yesterday at 5:12am<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 8:21pm<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:48pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 12:00am<b>JessMac9000</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 3:36pm<b>queensassygoat</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 2:01am<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 10:55pm<b>shain1988</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 11:04pm<b>ShadJV</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 5:29pm<b>the_doc</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:39pm<b>kovalsky</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 5:36am<b>Big_Bear99</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 4:49am<b>premo25</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:19am<b>AngusEcrivain</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:02am<b>avadakedabra</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:56am<b>Galacticain</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:36am<b>stangluv</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 5:36pm

Fucked!<b>the_doc</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:39pm<b>Lukeeeeee</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:12am<b>Lane_Lander300</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:37pm<b>NathanWilley</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 4:10am<b>Matheo</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:24pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 2:13pm<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:48pm<b>JoeOfDoom</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 8:00am<b>mattgainey</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:12am<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:57am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:50am<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:50am<b>damiens123456</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:33am<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:29am<b>dirtbikeguy</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:20am<b>insertnamehere37</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 7:33am<b>platypus546</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 11:22pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 7:12am

emeraldisle's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of emeraldisle's badges

emeraldisle's favorite FMLs

Today, I came out of the closet. Now whenever I'm getting ready to go somewhere with my dad he says, "Lesgo, lesbo." FML

#20876692
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56053) - you deserved it (12585)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by spiritbeast33 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53097) - you deserved it (19250)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I collected my new timetable at college only to find I've been dropped from all my classes. I've been listed as deceased. I'm definitely not dead and have no idea how I supposedly died. FML

#20867417
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50757) - you deserved it (2640)

On 09/04/2013 at 11:59am - work - by resurrected - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
526 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18817) - you deserved it (134861)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

#20862202
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44043) - you deserved it (3916)

On 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm - kids - by embarrassedmom - United States

Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML

#20861348
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46681) - you deserved it (2933)

On 08/31/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Redbridge)

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

#20844156
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46548) - you deserved it (2667)

On 08/19/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42328) - you deserved it (4909)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

#20827779
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46524) - you deserved it (6224)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm - kids - by JuggaloSlasher15 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

#20826835
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49109) - you deserved it (4346)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my husband putting my anti-wrinkle cream on his balls. He said, "I thought it'd help." FML

#20822001
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48948) - you deserved it (4933)

On 08/05/2013 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by Serum - United States (Kansas)

Today, my parents held a big family dinner at our house. Being the only underage person there, I had to sit there while everyone got progressively drunker and started commenting on how eerily similar I look to Shamu the whale. FML

#20821917
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44996) - you deserved it (4432)

On 08/05/2013 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

#20809554
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62699) - you deserved it (5436)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by PrettyScared (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my family and I went to feed carrots to the giraffes at the zoo. After I finished my first cup of carrots, I turned back to get some more. Suddenly, I was jerked back and a chunk of my hair was ripped out. The giraffe mistook the orange barrette in my hair for a carrot. FML

#20809312
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44774) - you deserved it (9639)

On 07/29/2013 at 4:19am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while texting my boyfriend, I noticed that he copies and pastes old messages so he doesn't have to write new ones. FML



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