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emeraldisle

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emeraldisle

9Liked!

emeraldisleemeraldisle
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 November 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3972
  • Number of comments : 595
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emeraldisle : I'm awesome.

Message me if you wanna chat. I love meeting new people. Don't be shy.

After being on this site for a while, I've come to realise that sarcasm and humour are lost on a lot of people.

emeraldisle's page activity

Visits<b>macncheeze97</b> - 7 hours ago<b>milehigh52</b> - 8 hours ago<b>Bulldozer36</b> - 8 hours ago<b>whereismyb4con</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Faddyy6</b> - 17 hours ago<b>8liroliro8</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 2:13am<b>gurbism</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 4:23pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:52am<b>nephilim241</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 6:53pm<b>olpally</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:19pm<b>Amandallynn</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 7:07pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:41pm<b>CandienInEurope</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:36am<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:00am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 10:52am<b>vreid</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 10:50am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 2:02am<b>TheDude992</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:06am

Liked!<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 3:07am<b>olpally</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 7:29pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 7:00am<b>dannyayala76</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 12:50am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 1:11pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 12:57am<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 7:36pm<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 12:19am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 2:45am

emeraldisle's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of emeraldisle's badges

emeraldisle's favorite FMLs

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44348) - you deserved it (5386)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

#20937890
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46802) - you deserved it (5061)

On 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML

#20937069
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38452) - you deserved it (3860)

On 10/28/2013 at 6:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27770) - you deserved it (41144)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46564) - you deserved it (3800)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

#20900698
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63533) - you deserved it (26397)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by -___- (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML

#20900665
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41219) - you deserved it (6900)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:21pm - misc - by noweddingforyou (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a pamphlet for alcohol counseling on my front door today. I think it was from the guys who pick up my recycling. FML

#20886188
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35654) - you deserved it (10600)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:19am - health - by I get the hint -

Today, after getting back from a year-long world trip, I nearly fell on my knees and cried when I saw boxes of Twinkies at my local gas station. Finding out they were back was the highlight of the year. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42223) - you deserved it (5372)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55093) - you deserved it (27652)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22243) - you deserved it (89529)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49577) - you deserved it (3950)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, I came out of the closet. Now whenever I'm getting ready to go somewhere with my dad he says, "Lesgo, lesbo." FML

#20876692
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55849) - you deserved it (12555)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by spiritbeast33 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51680) - you deserved it (18800)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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