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emeraldisle

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emeraldisle

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 22 November 1986 (27 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2753
  • Number of comments : 575
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emeraldisle : I'm awesome.

Message me if you wanna chat. I love meeting new people. Don't be shy.

After being on this site for a while, I've come to realise that sarcasm and humour are lost on a lot of people.

emeraldisle's page activity

Visits<b>killthedead</b> - 3 hours ago<b>HumbleExistence</b> - 9 hours ago<b>CammyGal</b> - 10 hours ago<b>rkdstp1995</b> - 10 hours ago<b>hulopro</b> - 10 hours ago<b>inner_peace</b> - 11 hours ago<b>DucHung</b> - 11 hours ago<b>baseballx07</b> - 11 hours ago<b>andy594328</b> - 12 hours ago<b>drumguy218</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 6:37pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 1:22pm<b>katherineisacat</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 5:52am<b>sm159509</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 1:41am<b>Danny_Boy12</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:55pm<b>stevieman99</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:48pm<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:46pm<b>recklessryan</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:14pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:39pm

emeraldisle's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of emeraldisle's badges

emeraldisle's favorite FMLs

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

#20900698
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61054) - you deserved it (25673)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by -___- (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML

#20900665
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41026) - you deserved it (6878)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:21pm - misc - by noweddingforyou (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a pamphlet for alcohol counseling on my front door today. I think it was from the guys who pick up my recycling. FML

#20886188
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35412) - you deserved it (10529)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:19am - health - by I get the hint -

Today, after getting back from a year-long world trip, I nearly fell on my knees and cried when I saw boxes of Twinkies at my local gas station. Finding out they were back was the highlight of the year. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42050) - you deserved it (5362)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54741) - you deserved it (27525)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22154) - you deserved it (88953)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

#20876988
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49402) - you deserved it (3941)

On 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm - animals - by ugh Buck! (woman) - United States

Today, I came out of the closet. Now whenever I'm getting ready to go somewhere with my dad he says, "Lesgo, lesbo." FML

#20876692
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54353) - you deserved it (12188)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by spiritbeast33 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51473) - you deserved it (18748)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I collected my new timetable at college only to find I've been dropped from all my classes. I've been listed as deceased. I'm definitely not dead and have no idea how I supposedly died. FML

#20867417
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48357) - you deserved it (2465)

On 09/04/2013 at 11:59am - work - by resurrected - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
513 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17815) - you deserved it (127745)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

#20862202
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41573) - you deserved it (3658)

On 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm - kids - by embarrassedmom - United States

Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML

#20861348
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44631) - you deserved it (2797)

On 08/31/2013 at 3:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Redbridge)

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

#20844156
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45418) - you deserved it (2581)

On 08/19/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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