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emeraldisle

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emeraldisle

87Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 November 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5847
  • Number of comments : 639
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emeraldisle : I'm awesome.

After being on this site for a while, I've come to realise that sarcasm and humour are lost on a lot of people.

emeraldisle's page activity

Visits<b>StormfrontX33</b> - 3 minutes ago<b>GoBoulder</b> - 10 hours ago<b>shanekicksass</b> - 18 hours ago<b>killer0689</b> - 24 hours ago<b>gopi</b> - yesterday at 4:38pm<b>notevenmad</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 12:41am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 9:16am<b>koganti</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 2:03am<b>fringeisawesome</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 8:22am<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 11:49am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:50am<b>StupidMonkey497</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:07am<b>_DeathsMelody_</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:40pm<b>captain_mal</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:17pm<b>DjMckay</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 3:39pm<b>Iwannarock1</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:59pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:06pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 9:05am

Fucked!<b>gopi</b> - yesterday at 10:38pm<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 6:32am<b>captain_mal</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:17am<b>khoov19</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 7:06pm<b>Chinhull</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:36pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 8:22am<b>igg125</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 8:58pm<b>the_doc</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:39pm<b>Lukeeeeee</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:12am<b>Lane_Lander300</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:37pm<b>NathanWilley</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 4:10am<b>Matheo</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:24pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 2:13pm<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:48pm<b>JoeOfDoom</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 8:00am<b>mattgainey</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:12am<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:57am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:50am

emeraldisle's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of emeraldisle's badges

emeraldisle's favorite FMLs

Today, I met an American guy at a bar. I felt flattered when he said, "You know what they say about Swedish girls, all so beautiful." After a pause, he filled in with, "What the fuck happened to you?" FML

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father for permission to take his daughter's hand in marriage. He asked me "Which one?" I said "Uh, the one I'm dating... Lisa." He belched and said, "Yeah sure, throw 'er off a cliff for all I care. Piss off, boy." So much for chivalry. FML

#21308242
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33479) - you deserved it (3035)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I drove over an hour to my grandma's house for her birthday party. When she answered the door, her eyes went wide and she said angrily "No, not you!" and slammed the door shut in my face. FML

#21306195
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30922) - you deserved it (2658)

On 11/26/2014 at 1:13pm - misc - by unwanted (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML

#21303901
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42526) - you deserved it (5214)

On 11/22/2014 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Kilkenny)

Today, I spent all day making preparations and buying food for my upcoming birthday. It's not for a party, though - none of my friends wanted to come. I'm preparing for the launch of the new World of Warcraft expansion. FML

#21295219
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31109) - you deserved it (6554)

On 11/09/2014 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I looked at my twelve-year-old daughter's test. One of the question was, "When is a good time to worry about your parents?" Her answer was, "When they take selfies, because selfies aren't made for old people." FML

#21292082
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30311) - you deserved it (5612)

On 11/04/2014 at 4:48pm - kids - by The Selfie Parent - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, I was singing in my dorm. When I left a little later, a cute guy came up to me and asked if I was the girl who'd been singing. I proudly said yes. He replied, "Good thing you finally shut the fuck up!" and walked away. FML

#21290447
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32499) - you deserved it (9907)

On 11/02/2014 at 11:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into the kitchen at the exact moment my uncle decided to bend over in short shorts. Apparently, his ballsack decided it needed extra room, because it dangled out of his pant leg. FML

#21283844
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37446) - you deserved it (3068)

On 10/23/2014 at 4:05pm - misc - by Alexismaria - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

#21283795
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37367) - you deserved it (4575)

On 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML

#21281374
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32359) - you deserved it (3043)

On 10/19/2014 at 10:20pm - kids - by team hit bella with a car (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, as a limo driver, I had to drive 8 guys for a night-out from their wives. I put the Michigan/Rutgers game on the radio, thinking they would appreciate that. Apparently, they wanted to listen to their "pump-up" songs instead, which were mostly Katy Perry songs. FML

#21271972
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37590) - you deserved it (4809)

On 10/06/2014 at 11:05am - work - by theseguysarewhipped... - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I overheard my brother telling his friend that having sex with a girl who's on the pill gives the guy female hormones and "turns you into like, half-chick, half-dude." He was serious. How am I related to this moron? FML

#21270200
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35886) - you deserved it (2918)

On 10/03/2014 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a guy told me I "kind of look like a girl" if he looked at me from the right angle. Well, I am a girl, and this is the closest thing to a compliment that I've gotten in years. FML

Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML

#21261512
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37294) - you deserved it (3710)

On 09/19/2014 at 10:27pm - misc - by failingdaily - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, while on the bus, a friendly-looking guy smiled at me, so I smiled back. He then pointed at my teeth and said, "You gonna get those fixed, or just keep them as a conversation starter?" FML



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