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emeraldisle

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emeraldisle

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 22 November 1986 (27 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2705
  • Number of comments : 574
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emeraldisle : I'm awesome.

Message me if you wanna chat. I love meeting new people. Don't be shy.

After being on this site for a while, I've come to realise that sarcasm and humour are lost on a lot of people.

emeraldisle's page activity

Visits<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 1:22pm<b>katherineisacat</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 5:52am<b>sm159509</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 1:41am<b>Danny_Boy12</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:55pm<b>stevieman99</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:48pm<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:46pm<b>recklessryan</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:14pm<b>killthedead</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:44pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:39pm<b>Sbx426</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:36pm<b>turtles4life</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:50pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:25am<b>Reva750</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 9:03pm<b>abattior</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 3:43am<b>missmandersxoxo</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 3:30am<b>Luke1787</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 3:33am<b>Vitrolicz</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 1:23pm<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 10:10am

emeraldisle's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of emeraldisle's badges

emeraldisle's favorite FMLs

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

#21010264
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42604) - you deserved it (21752)

On 12/30/2013 at 7:10am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to take a shower. When I turned it on, no water came out. Only ants. FML

#21006941
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53863) - you deserved it (3432)

On 12/27/2013 at 2:28am - misc - by anon - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my car was keyed, while I was still sitting in it. FML

Today, I was at a Christmas party when I noticed someone had taken all of the cash I had from out of my wallet. It was a family gathering. I'm related to the culprit but have no idea who it is. FML

#20994219
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37838) - you deserved it (2753)

On 12/15/2013 at 11:47pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML

#20986479
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54210) - you deserved it (4182)

On 12/09/2013 at 4:01pm - misc - by igotpride - United States

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37585) - you deserved it (20799)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

#20965644
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53508) - you deserved it (11457)

On 11/21/2013 at 11:10am - misc - by smooth (man) - United States

Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML

#20959118
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43705) - you deserved it (4193)

On 11/15/2013 at 8:53pm - kids - by I don't know, son (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was watching some episodes of The Walking Dead with my boyfriend, after recently introducing him to the series. A scene involving Carl came on, and my boyfriend said, "God damn. You ever give me a kid that annoying, I'll shoot both of ya right in the head." FML

#20950616
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37178) - you deserved it (6653)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:50pm - misc - by kel (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42483) - you deserved it (5178)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

#20937890
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46400) - you deserved it (5029)

On 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML

#20937069
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36243) - you deserved it (3616)

On 10/28/2013 at 6:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26690) - you deserved it (39517)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46174) - you deserved it (3772)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a text asking him to come over a little later and have some "fun" with me. He texted back, "WTF babe? Breaking Bad's on tonight. You got a dildo, fucking use it." FML

#20900698
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55543) - you deserved it (22676)

On 09/29/2013 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by -___- (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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