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emeraldisle

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emeraldisle

9Liked!

emeraldisleemeraldisle
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 November 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3942
  • Number of comments : 594
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About emeraldisle : I'm awesome.

Message me if you wanna chat. I love meeting new people. Don't be shy.

After being on this site for a while, I've come to realise that sarcasm and humour are lost on a lot of people.

emeraldisle's page activity

Visits<b>8liroliro8</b> - 9 hours ago<b>gurbism</b> - 19 hours ago<b>andy594328</b> - yesterday at 1:52am<b>nephilim241</b> - yesterday at 6:53pm<b>olpally</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:19pm<b>Amandallynn</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 7:07pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:41pm<b>CandienInEurope</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:36am<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:00am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 10:52am<b>vreid</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 10:50am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 2:02am<b>TheDude992</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:06am<b>Evil20071</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 8:04pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 8:05am<b>ActionFearo</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 3:46am<b>K_kanaka</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 6:39pm<b>rogwest</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 3:06pm

Liked!<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 3:07am<b>olpally</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 7:29pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 7:00am<b>dannyayala76</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 12:50am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 1:11pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 12:57am<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 7:36pm<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 12:19am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 2:45am

emeraldisle's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of emeraldisle's badges

emeraldisle's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my mom blow-drying my grinning dad's pubes. FML

#21343357
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25598) - you deserved it (3155)

On 01/24/2015 at 9:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed my husband in the shower singing Chicago's "You're the Inspiration" to his penis while manscaping. I guess that's a bond we'll never have. FML

#21342844
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24179) - you deserved it (3078)

On 01/23/2015 at 11:46am - intimacy - by LD - United States (Idaho)

Today, I mixed up my chapstick and cork grease. Now my clarinet smells like cherries, and my lips smell like a gym floor. FML

#21340194
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28224) - you deserved it (6294)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I sat my son down for the sex talk. By the time it was over, he'd corrected me on several factual errors and told me what felching is. Now I remember why I never wanted kids. FML

#21340142
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30408) - you deserved it (6359)

On 01/19/2015 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I told my dog to give me the stick he had in his mouth so I could throw it for him. After I picked it up I realized it was a dried-out piece of shit. FML

#21338477
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20609) - you deserved it (12155)

On 01/16/2015 at 7:37pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized that while I've been the same minuscule height for the past five years, my feet won't stop growing. I'm 5 foot and a size 12. I look like a clown. FML

#21338417
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27561) - you deserved it (5580)

On 01/16/2015 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my father was playing with my son and his toy animals. He picked one up and said, "What is this? Some kind of African horse?" It was a zebra. FML

Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my pads were not in fact "big band-aids" and that he should probably remove them from his legs. FML

#21328540
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28193) - you deserved it (2766)

On 01/01/2015 at 10:09am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I witnessed my very overweight cat trying to jump over my fence, only to shit himself half way up, and then land in it. FML

Today, my parents had a loud argument over who is worse in bed. FML

#21320583
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29458) - you deserved it (2054)

On 12/19/2014 at 10:16pm - misc - by cantunhear - United States (New York)

Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML

#21318238
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31568) - you deserved it (3656)

On 12/15/2014 at 10:38pm - kids - by Lisa - United States (Missouri)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32679) - you deserved it (2527)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42292) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I met an American guy at a bar. I felt flattered when he said, "You know what they say about Swedish girls, all so beautiful." After a pause, he filled in with, "What the fuck happened to you?" FML

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father for permission to take his daughter's hand in marriage. He asked me "Which one?" I said "Uh, the one I'm dating... Lisa." He belched and said, "Yeah sure, throw 'er off a cliff for all I care. Piss off, boy." So much for chivalry. FML

#21308242
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33269) - you deserved it (2997)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



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