emILYforever

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emILYforever

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1235
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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emILYforever's page activity

Visits<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 6:42am<b>WordBea</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 11:11am<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 8:46am<b>Feminism</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 10:14am<b>Bob3332</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:40pm<b>DraconicFeline</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 2:15pm<b>TheKittiesTitays</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 12:05am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 1:18am<b>elJefe98</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 8:35pm<b>Rizzen</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 7:59am<b>miss_madison</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 7:32pm<b>Starter</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 8:56am<b>hollybird84</b> - the 12/23/2011 at 8:11am<b>imafaglol</b> - the 12/22/2011 at 12:57am

emILYforever's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

emILYforever's favorite FMLs

Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML

by crazyt446 / 07/11/2009 at 11:13am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML

by RachelDC / 07/03/2009 at 3:06pm / United States (West Virginia) / Animals

Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea to see what websites I go on from my computer while I wasn't home. She clicked the link that gave my computer a virus that I just got rid of a few days ago. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2009 at 1:52pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a coffee date. The guy was waiting with coffee to meet me on the patio. I walked up to him, caught my favorite pendant necklace on the table, broke the necklace trying to get it free, and rattled the table so intensely that the guy's coffee spilled all over him. FML

by vintage_vogue / 06/17/2009 at 12:52am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a plane home from Ireland, my husband who was severely hungover, vomitted in a bag before we took off. When he got up to put the bag in the bin the stewardess forced him to sit back down. I had to hold on to a bag full of vomit for a good few minutes whilst my husband was passed out. FML

by scarlett666 / 06/04/2009 at 10:04pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Transportation

Today, on a plane home from Ireland, my husband who was severely hungover, vomitted in a bag before we took off. When he got up to put the bag in the bin the stewardess forced him to sit back down. I had to hold on to a bag full of vomit for a good few minutes whilst my husband was passed out. FML

by scarlett666 / 06/04/2009 at 10:04pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Transportation

Today, I took my girlfriend to a Bo Bice concert for her birthday. She loves him so I bought us second row seats. After we got there we ran into some friends of hers sitting way back in the lawn section, and of course she wanted to sit with them. I paid $300 to sit on the grass and watch Bo Bice. FML

by roark0806 / 05/29/2009 at 9:54am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend who lives in China contacted me and told me she'd been harassed by a guy and was thinking about pressing charges. The guy is someone I know from college - he promised me he would say "hi" to her for me while he was in Shanghai. FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2009 at 12:18pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Love

Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML

by Droolgirl / 05/25/2009 at 9:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I had a dentist appointment after class so I threw my electric toothbrush in my backpack so I could brush my teeth before. In the middle of class the toothbrush turns on and the vibrations could be heard throughout the classroom. They yelled at me "Jess has a vibrator!" FML

by jess / 04/30/2009 at 12:51am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was going to propose. Since he was really nervous, he decided to have a couple of drinks to loosen up. He ended up throwing up and passing out before he could get down on one knee. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2009 at 3:12pm / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend was going to propose. Since he was really nervous, he decided to have a couple of drinks to loosen up. He ended up throwing up and passing out before he could get down on one knee. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2009 at 3:12pm / United States / Love

Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2009 at 5:46pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was at a ballet recital with my friend, sitting between her and the mother of the head male ballerina. When he came on stage in obscenely tight white tights I whispered to my friend, "You can see his whole freaking package!" I'd whispered to the wrong side. FML

by lalalohan / 04/17/2009 at 11:19am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had hooked up with this girl and had finally lulled her asleep. I didn't want to stay so I quietly managed to get my clothes back on and get out the door without waking her. I made it all the way out of her building and to my car before I realized I had forgotten my keys. FML

by Smooth / 04/11/2009 at 3:38am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy