About eggmarie : I'm Erika, I'm 19, and you probably shouldn't take me seriously.
If you're here because I said something that upset you, remember you're on the Internet and you can choose to not look at my posts.
But contrary to popular belief I can be a nice person (shit I'm in nursing school so it's kinda a requirement) so if you want to talk or whatever message me*
Okay that's all bye
*if you want to message me I do use the app but I check for messages like once every few days if I have time.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, my 17 pound cat fell from a counter. It wouldn't have been a big deal if he didn't try to use my leg as a tree to cling onto on the way down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21939) - you deserved it (3275)
On 07/30/2011 at 7:58pm - animals - by Backinzi - United States (Iowa)
Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30263) - you deserved it (6652)
On 07/13/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Ignored - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46118) - you deserved it (14701)
On 07/06/2011 at 7:26am - intimacy - by devilboy - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29688) - you deserved it (6816)
On 06/15/2011 at 10:42pm - misc - by missy - United States (Alaska)
Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9858) - you deserved it (43837)
On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I sent my boyfriend a long and heartfelt message. He responded with "tl; dr". FML
I agree, your life sucks (21193) - you deserved it (4651)
On 06/07/2011 at 12:43am - love - by Maddie110110 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37526) - you deserved it (2377)
On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35440) - you deserved it (4359)
On 05/21/2011 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by squirrels69ing (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend came home from a camping trip and broke up with me. All because when he was watching the lake he was near, ripples formed. Apparently, this means God was telling him I'm impure and unable to be "saved by Christ" and therefore, a waste of his time. I dated this lunatic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28420) - you deserved it (977)
Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35515) - you deserved it (15871)
On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States
Today, I discovered that my new boyfriend is the type of guy who, when there is a conflict, will just scream "I LOVE YOU" over and over hoping that it will solve itself instead of actually trying to work the problem out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30389) - you deserved it (5740)
On 05/05/2011 at 10:40am - love - by sad (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)
Today, I came home to find that all my porn magazines have been "censored" with a black sharpie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19673) - you deserved it (39436)
On 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, it was sunny and bright so I woke up feeling great. I pulled back the curtains in my room and saw my cat dead on the lawn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37670) - you deserved it (2849)
On 04/07/2011 at 3:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Today, I asked my friend what form of birth control she used the first time she had sex. She stared at me like I was from another planet and said, "You can't get pregnant the first time..." This moron is my best friend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38934) - you deserved it (6656)
On 03/26/2011 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Thatslife (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)
Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41120) - you deserved it (3496)
On 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm - work - by Kim - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 20 May 2013
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