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eggmarie

Offline (the 08/27/2014 at 7:04pm) | Search for a member

eggmarie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3088
  • Number of comments : 253
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 10 posted

About eggmarie : I'm Erika, I'm 20, and you probably shouldn't take me seriously.

eggmarie's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 1:20pm<b>Dccj456</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 12:19pm<b>slimblack</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:35pm<b>KennyBound</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 5:24pm<b>ryanator008</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:17pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:03pm<b>tomboy480</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:19pm<b>SailorSolaris</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 7:47pm<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 2:27pm<b>Googolman</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:50pm<b>ilmanator</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 10:52pm<b>Rain4Tears</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 9:20pm<b>invadermaythe1st</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 4:57pm<b>ced443</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 2:26am<b>flametrafox</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 10:53pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 1:00pm<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 3:07pm<b>ocramavaf</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 11:45pm

eggmarie's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of eggmarie's badges

eggmarie's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

#18844188
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (4977)

On 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom

Today, I drove into a cluster of dustbins thanks to my dozy cat who'd managed to get into my car, fall asleep, and wake up while I was driving to work. I lost control when I was startled by him staring at me in the rear-view mirror. FML

#18842582
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23446) - you deserved it (4846)

On 01/18/2012 at 6:30am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

#18802490
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26646) - you deserved it (8604)

On 01/14/2012 at 1:52am - intimacy - by haggisbowl - United States

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

#18754752
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30848) - you deserved it (2307)

On 01/09/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by maruskasommers (woman) - Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj)

Today, I walked into my elderly grandmother's trailer, used the bathroom and went to wash my hands. She had a soft spot in the floor that she covered with a bathmat. I fell through. Right leg up to my hip in the floor, boobs stuck on the counter. My husband and grandmother stood there laughing. FML

#18624537
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23719) - you deserved it (2675)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my friend told me how depressing it is that she hasn't had sex in two weeks. I haven't had sex in 3 years. FML

#18614402
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33840) - you deserved it (5250)

On 12/26/2011 at 6:48am - intimacy - by Sally - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11003) - you deserved it (87420)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

#18439975
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14621) - you deserved it (39211)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was watching TV, my boyfriend took my unicorn pillow pet and made it hump my arm. I told him to stop acting like a child. He replied, "Children don't have sex like this," and started making sex noises while making the pillow pet hump my arm faster and harder. FML

#18425856
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28589) - you deserved it (9993)

On 12/04/2011 at 8:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML

#18370889
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38006) - you deserved it (9337)

On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

#18342381
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12926) - you deserved it (45440)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26796) - you deserved it (7947)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my 20-year-old boyfriend won't touch my boobs because he is afraid his parents will find out. FML

#18203488
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42349) - you deserved it (5067)

On 11/09/2011 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Great... (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, while cuddling up on the couch with my boyfriend, I asked him if this was his happy place too. He said, "Nah, it's in pussies." FML

#18165328
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29028) - you deserved it (9143)

On 11/05/2011 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by whatadisappointmnet (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML

#18108138
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33170) - you deserved it (7513)

On 10/30/2011 at 1:02am - love - by Anonymous - United States



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