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eggmarie

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eggmarie
  • Town/Country : Ohio, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 December 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 2256
  • Number of comments : 249
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 9 posted

About eggmarie : I'm Erika, I'm 20, and you probably shouldn't take me seriously.

If you're here because I said something that upset you, remember you're on the Internet and you can choose to not look at my posts.

But contrary to popular belief I can be a nice person (shit I'm in nursing school so it's kinda a requirement) so if you want to talk or whatever message me*

Okay that's all bye

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eggmarie's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of eggmarie's badges

eggmarie's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML

#19910380
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16706) - you deserved it (6382)

On 07/08/2012 at 5:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

#19903031
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58971) - you deserved it (4705)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Dammit - United States (California)

Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML

#19900187
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38752) - you deserved it (4010)

On 07/06/2012 at 1:44pm - love - by wife of a shithead (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to pretend my tampons were "dynamite" and run around the house throwing them at my friends and family. FML

#19893089
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17089) - you deserved it (1878)

On 07/05/2012 at 12:01am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML

#19881608
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25487) - you deserved it (4239)

On 07/02/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by nobrony (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25806) - you deserved it (3485)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML

#19862258
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18117) - you deserved it (3179)

On 06/28/2012 at 7:44pm - misc - by zombieguyswife (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML

#19851648
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21818) - you deserved it (1507)

On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought he could make a pregnancy test read positive by jizzing on it. FML

#19822088
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23489) - you deserved it (3845)

On 06/21/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by really (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

#19806269
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26795) - you deserved it (2700)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

Today, I tried to go to the gym, but I ended up watching cat videos on YouTube for three hours. FML

#19791305
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7748) - you deserved it (24697)

On 06/15/2012 at 7:27am - health - by latino14 - United States (Maryland)

Today, all my guy friends kept hugging me tightly and then softly and then tightly again. I later found out they just wanted to feel my boobs on their chests. FML

#19787758
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23014) - you deserved it (5871)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by a chick in California - United States (California)

Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML

#19719748
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13591) - you deserved it (26601)

On 06/02/2012 at 6:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I met up with my dad after having worked abroad for the past six months. Apparently, during that time he's had a mid-life crisis or been snorting a few too many turds, because he's now some sort of hippie calling himself "Memnoch of Pleiades". FML

#19705574
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16155) - you deserved it (1592)

On 05/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by wtf (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)



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