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eggmarie

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eggmarie
  • Town/Country : Ohio, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 December 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 2270
  • Number of comments : 249
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 9 posted

About eggmarie : I'm Erika, I'm 20, and you probably shouldn't take me seriously.

If you're here because I said something that upset you, remember you're on the Internet and you can choose to not look at my posts.

But contrary to popular belief I can be a nice person (shit I'm in nursing school so it's kinda a requirement) so if you want to talk or whatever message me*

Okay that's all bye

eggmarie's last visitors

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eggmarie's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of eggmarie's badges

eggmarie's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

#13287262
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25874) - you deserved it (2895)

On 10/02/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend, the love of my life. Actually I ran into a billboard for her college, where apparently she is the new "poster girl" for their advertising campaign. I have now seen her on 2 billboards, a newspaper ad and a bus. FML

#13209934
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26336) - you deserved it (2831)

On 09/26/2010 at 2:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend changing. She responded by screaming, throwing herself on the ground to avoid me seeing her, and crawling into the bathroom. We've been living together for 2 months. FML

#12948650
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31211) - you deserved it (4628)

On 09/07/2010 at 1:06pm - love - by drew - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to moisturise my dog's testicles because they got sunburnt. FML

#12305755
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38187) - you deserved it (6922)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:24am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML

#12187876
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33433) - you deserved it (13292)

On 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Sunshine.0.ninja - United States (Ohio)

Today, during an early morning preflight check, I spotted liquid pooling under the aircraft. I rubbed my fingers in it and sniffed. Good news? No dangerous fuel or hydraulic fluid leak. Bad news? My copilot was too lazy to walk back to the hangar to take a leak. FML

#11954418
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31032) - you deserved it (3679)

On 07/18/2010 at 1:02am - work - by Flyboy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I watched a stray dog hump a garden gnome in my front yard. So did my two year old daughter. I've already had to stop her "re-enactments" twice. FML

#11806163
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28637) - you deserved it (3881)

On 07/11/2010 at 4:05am - intimacy - by awkwardsituation - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I lost my anal virginity because my boyfriend "slipped". FML

#11117532
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50290) - you deserved it (20659)

On 06/11/2010 at 12:56am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on when her cat attacked me. I was pissed, so I grabbed the cat and rushed outside to get rid of it. Little did I know, her parents were home, sitting outside. So I was naked, with a feral cat in front of my junk trying to kill me. All I could say was "Nice Weather?" FML

#10761245
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17271) - you deserved it (31117)

On 05/25/2010 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

#10707989
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16248) - you deserved it (24216)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

#9643258
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35339) - you deserved it (7089)

On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, the boy I like finally acknowledged me. He came up to me and uttered two words: "Nice pooper." FML

#9097770
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14991) - you deserved it (2691)

On 03/15/2010 at 5:14am - intimacy - by shygurl434 - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML

#8972431
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25452) - you deserved it (3461)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by watersport (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a 95 on my term project. To congratulate me, my boyfriend said we're having sex tonight. I only get laid if I get good grades. FML

#8821519
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21943) - you deserved it (5528)

On 03/04/2010 at 10:48am - intimacy - by lalararara - United States

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

#8743976
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33090) - you deserved it (2190)

On 03/01/2010 at 8:17am - misc - by GuiltByTenuousAssociation (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



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