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eggmarie

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eggmarie
  • Town/Country : Ohio, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 December 1993 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1413
  • Number of comments : 248
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 9 posted

About eggmarie : I'm Erika, I'm 19, and you probably shouldn't take me seriously.

If you're here because I said something that upset you, remember you're on the Internet and you can choose to not look at my posts.

But contrary to popular belief I can be a nice person (shit I'm in nursing school so it's kinda a requirement) so if you want to talk or whatever message me*

Okay that's all bye

*if you want to message me I do use the app but I check for messages like once every few days if I have time.

eggmarie's last visitors

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eggmarie's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of eggmarie's badges

eggmarie's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my anal virginity because my boyfriend "slipped". FML

#11117532
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44906) - you deserved it (16501)

On 06/11/2010 at 12:56am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on when her cat attacked me. I was pissed, so I grabbed the cat and rushed outside to get rid of it. Little did I know, her parents were home, sitting outside. So I was naked, with a feral cat in front of my junk trying to kill me. All I could say was "Nice Weather?" FML

#10761245
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16024) - you deserved it (25247)

On 05/25/2010 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

#10707989
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13913) - you deserved it (18557)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, fifteen minutes after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that you're smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick out of your mouth and then it's good if you have something interesting to say." Check please. FML

#9643258
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34461) - you deserved it (7050)

On 04/05/2010 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Hate2Date (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, the boy I like finally acknowledged me. He came up to me and uttered two words: "Nice pooper." FML

#9097770
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14050) - you deserved it (2610)

On 03/15/2010 at 5:14am - intimacy - by shygurl434 - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML

#8972431
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22779) - you deserved it (2881)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by watersport (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a 95 on my term project. To congratulate me, my boyfriend said we're having sex tonight. I only get laid if I get good grades. FML

#8821519
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17895) - you deserved it (4361)

On 03/04/2010 at 10:48am - intimacy - by lalararara - United States

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

#8743976
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29067) - you deserved it (1697)

On 03/01/2010 at 8:17am - misc - by GuiltByTenuousAssociation (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
457 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5229) - you deserved it (40087)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

#8250331
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6112) - you deserved it (24529)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my ex looked at me for the first time in months. I felt like I could fly. Seconds later my flight ended. I fell down the stairs. FML

#7164896
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14998) - you deserved it (8330)

On 01/05/2010 at 3:24pm - love - by katiekat (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was talking to the guy that has been in love with me for two years. He said "There is a shortage of perfect breasts in the world. It would be a shame to lose yours." He then creepily looked at me and said "It's true." Thanks, Princess Bride, for supplying creepers with material. FML

#6998674
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16612) - you deserved it (3029)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:50pm - love - by creeped (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend. Things got a little hot and I started to pull up my shirt. She screamed and told me to stop because the innocence of her stuffed animals was at stake. We are 18, and she was dead serious. FML

#6933705
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15794) - you deserved it (2420)

On 12/25/2009 at 2:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my wife entered in an ugliest sweater competition at her work. She wore a plain white sweater with a picture of my face printed on it. She came home with first prize. FML

#6811696
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28288) - you deserved it (2718)

On 12/18/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by mclovin09 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife entered in an ugliest sweater competition at her work. She wore a plain white sweater with a picture of my face printed on it. She came home with first prize. FML

#6811696
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28288) - you deserved it (2718)

On 12/18/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by mclovin09 (man) - United States (California)



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Monday 20 May 2013

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