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edythecovelly

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edythecovelly

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  • Number of visits : 155
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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edythecovelly's favorite FMLs

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

#17134448
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39273) - you deserved it (4245)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17441) - you deserved it (61225)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

#16657656
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13651) - you deserved it (47868)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came to the conclusion that you should always tell the truth. While I was busy reassuring her that the condom didn't break, she was telling me how it was okay because she was on the pill. According to the pregnancy test, we both lied. FML

#14585624
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12038) - you deserved it (46696)

On 01/15/2011 at 2:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML

#12408550
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40680) - you deserved it (13273)

On 08/09/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Mikey832 (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

#11389778
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17919) - you deserved it (56675)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm - health - by fartwoman - United States (California)

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

#8576368
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26763) - you deserved it (5242)

On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML

#8085634
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18387) - you deserved it (5905)

On 02/10/2010 at 10:08am - intimacy - by ryan - United States

Today, I discovered that my supervisor has been submitting completed projects to our manager on time for everyone on the team but me. She has been deliberately making it appear as though I am weeks behind on my projects, when in reality I am one of the first ones done every month. FML

#7453397
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30729) - you deserved it (1797)

On 01/20/2010 at 8:31am - work - by superscrewed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I hurried into the bank to cash in the $5,000 check my grandparents had given me for college money. I found out that instead of my name, they wrote 'our sweet iddle pumpkinbutt'. I couldn't make eye contact with anyone after. FML

#7401501
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23381) - you deserved it (4116)

On 01/17/2010 at 4:08pm - misc - by pumpkinbutt - Sent from mobile version

Today, I drove 600 miles to be with my boyfriend of two years for his uncle's funeral. He didn't want me to come because I am seven months pregnant and flying is dangerous in the third trimester. When I got there I don't know who was more suprised to see me: him, his wife, or their kids. FML

#6210144
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73760) - you deserved it (5818)

On 11/08/2009 at 10:39am - love - by homewrecker - United States

Today, I got a letter in the mail saying I'm being sued by the guy that broke into my house last week. When I walked in and saw him, I tackled him, punched him in the face a time or two, and restrained him with zip ties. I now have to pay for his broken nose and face charges of assault. FML

#6195343
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46569) - you deserved it (4229)

On 11/07/2009 at 12:01pm - misc - by ShouldHaveLetHimTakeTheTV (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I saw my grandmother. All of my cousins and I went to say "hi" to her, one by one. When I got up to her and said, "Hi grandma!", she said in Chinese, "I don't remember this one." FML

#6177854
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29928) - you deserved it (2106)

On 11/06/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by ForgottenKid (man) - United States (California)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27058) - you deserved it (4932)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I came home about two hours early from a friend's party. After I walked in and upstairs, I quickly and quietly left and went back to the party. I guess my parents decided to have a little party as well. It's called a threesome with my neighbor. They still don't know that I know. FML

#3932476
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60610) - you deserved it (3750)

On 07/21/2009 at 3:47pm - intimacy - by emkatch (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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